KISSIN' CAUSEIN'S !?
rehashed from March 08
Don't worry I'm not going to ask you to tell me your favorite Big Screen Smooch..
you can if you want to...
but, have you ever wondered if we homo escapeons simply mimic passionate "Movie" kissing or is that type of kissing natural?
Once you have seen one of these torrid smooches on a giant screen aren't you disappointed if you don't receive an earth-moving Kiss?
This same logic dictates the reason that ordinary people should NOT watch porn.
The success of do-it-yourself sites like YouPorn prove once and for all that regular folks will be devastatingly discouraged by their 'shortcomings' if they try to mimic the Herculean performances of the Pros...
not to mention the abscence of all those ridiculously embelleshed 'bits' on display that most of us are neither born with n'or can we afford to implant them.
Do you suppose that prehistorical Cavemen tried hanging upside down or rolling in the surf having slurpy kisses?
Back in 1967 the author of The Naked Ape, Desmond Morris, suggested that mutual sexual gratification (Ladies Stop Laughing) was the key to securing a pair bond which was essential for successfully raising offspring.
He said that our species evolved by choosing mates with less hair and therefore more errogenous zones, female breasts became portruding, hemispherical, eye-magnets to divert the males attention to the front, so that we could invent the missionary position, which developed as a way to make reproducing more enjoyable.....
and it was easier to kiss.
OK scrub your brains and let's try to focus on just Kissing..oh wait....
This Kiss/Sex thingamabob reminds me of my favorite scene in Monty Python's Meaning Of Life when John Cleese is teaching Sex-Ed to the remarkably, disinterested, pupils.
Whilst discussing foreplay he says,
"What's wrong with a kiss, boy?
Why not start her off with a nice kiss?
You don't have to go leaping straight for the clitoris like a bull at a gate.
Give her a kiss, boy ."
According to Wiki;
-Anthropologists haven't reached a consensus as to whether Kissing is a learned or instinctive behavior
-Kissing may may be related to grooming behavior or may be the result of mammalian mothers premasticating..that's MASTICATING..
food for their children in order to recognize biological dangers to their offspring
-Kissing allows prospective mates to smell and taste each other's hornymones (also know as pheromones) for biological compatibility
-Ladies are subconsciously more attracted to men whose major histocompatibility complex portion of their genome is different from their own; leading to offspring with resistance to a greater number of diseases due to heterosis, and thus having a better chance of survival...
which is why we put the kibosh on Kissin' Cousins!
This explains why couples are more likely to bond if they have the right chemistry ! This tedious examination sort of takes all the mystery out of Life doesn't it?
So the hell with that.
Q. Of all the kisses that you've ever had, what percentage of those would be face-sucking, skull-drilling, take-me-now, make-me-lose-control, lip locking...
and how often do you want it?