Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Yo
I was totally surprised that there were so many Yogis listed on the Interweb because in my world there are only three.

Yogi Berra, Yogi Bear, and Maharishi Mahesh Yogi.

In 1957, the year that I was incarnated, Maharishi_Mahesh_Yogi ‘invented’ Transcendental Meditation in Madras, India. The Beatles made him famous in ‘67 and 50 years later everybody knows what a mantra is. Maharishi Mahesh is still trying to create Heaven on Earth via his weekly satellite broadcasts and webcasts.

Born in 1958, Yogi_Bear was smarter than the average bear and much to the chagrin of Ranger Smith, Yogi dedicated his life to the art of snatching pic-a-nic baskets in Jellystone Park.



My Yogi, Lawrence Yogi_Berra (b.1925) was an 8th grade drop out who became more famous for his genius at malapropism, which he raised to an Art Form, than he was for being an AllStar player, manager, and coach, in the National Baseball League.
Here are some of his finest creations, many of which are now deeply embedded in our language:

"Nobody goes there anymore, it's too crowded!"

"It ain't over till it's over."

"If the world were perfect, it wouldn't be."

"If people don't want to come to the ballpark, how are you going to stop them?"

"It's deja vu all over again."

"Baseball is 90% mental. The other half is physical."

"You can observe a lot by watching."

"If you don't go to other people funerals, they won't go to yours."
and my personal favorite,

"When you come to a fork in the road, take it."


You may not know it, but one of Yogi Berra’s greatest disciples is President George Dubya Bush. I for one am thoroughly impressed with his growing list of Bushisms. Enjoy.

“Rarely is the question asked, is our children learning?"

"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."

"Make no mistake about it, I understand how tough it is, sir. I talk to families who die."

"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too manyOB/GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across the country."

"They misunderestimated ..."

"There's an old saying in Tennessee—I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee—that says: fool me once, shame on ...
(long pause) shame on you?
(long pause) Fool me - you can't get fooled again."

"You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test."

"We cannot let terrorists and rogue nations hold this nation hostile or hold our allies hostile"

30 comments:

  1. Ah, but people were afraid to steal when Yogi B. was behind the plate...nobody misunderestimated his skills.

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  2. We are glad that the so-called Yogis and Babas have left the Indian Shores for the salvation of the Americans. That way they are able to fill their own pockets too not to forget the carnal ones too.

    Only three on your list? How could you forget OSHO?

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  3. did you hear the one about the buddhist monk who refused novocaine at the dentist's office?

    he wanted to transcend dental medication!

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  4. allan,
    That is true he was an incredible catcher, but he transcended the ridiculous, statistical, world of baseball (zzzz) with his unique phraseology.


    gautami,
    FO SHO I should have mentioned OSHO but the entire episode of that sex maniac hypnotising well educated people and making them wear red and live on bean sprouts while his numero uno henchwoman Ma was bussing in vagrants to win the civic election in Antelope is too scary to be funny. It proved P T Barnum's slogan that there is a sucker born every minute. Totally embarrasing and a warning about Democracy that must never be forgotten.

    At least the Beatles, John anyway, figured out that this Yogi wasn't the 'answer' shortly after the mahahorny little guy allegedly tried to become 'at one' with some of the ladies.

    chaucer's bitch,
    Ba Da Boom Ba Da Bing
    She's here all weeks folks!

    Awesome! How long have you had to wait to tell that joke?

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  5. So - I'm going to be a little sexist right now - fair warning.

    How the HELL can guys remember complicated stats from 40 years ago about a sport that puts any normal person to sleep, and they forget to buy toilet paper??

    Gah.

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  6. We have some geniuses in "malapropism" in our government as well, and not to forget : the king of malapropism : our Prince Philip. On his last "business" trip to China, he praised the Chinese for their good care of the environment (???!!!)

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  7. Homo Escapeons,


    hey there boo-boo how a..bout a pic-a-nic basket...smiles. i love that bear.

    As for your yogi, gotta love a man that will still stand in front a million people even after makes a complete ass of himself. ( course the does not apply to Mr. Bush)

    As president mr. Bush should being about to speak without sticking both his feet in his mouth. I mean, he is suppose to be the most powerful man in the U.S. Somehow I am thinking he isn't, at least not when tit comes to making things up and talking out loud.

    I sure hope that we are smarter voters this next time. somehow I doubt it. We will get sucked in by the same old things and fr some reason think it will be different this time.

    Let me shake my head here.. cause I am at a loss at what the world is coming to and where we as a nation are becoming. I feel embarrassed.

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  8. After making fun of Dubya for so long, I actually used the word "misunderestimated" to the kids the other day. I guess it's because I've joked about it enough. I immediately bit my tongue and explained why that was so wrong. They didn't understand my embarassment. Which is good.

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  9. i tell it as often as i can, but there aren't many people who get it or find it funny. i knew you would, you clever canuk, you!

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  10. Escapeons,

    I am sending my apologies for my sloppy tying...

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  11. I cannot believe those words came out of Bush's mouth. How embarassing! And I thought we were the only ones who had a President who deserved to be the butt of jokes.

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  12. tidalgirrrrl,
    Isn't that assinine? Baseball is so frickin' boring and tedious that statistics are a way to combat the somnabulistic qualities of the 14 hour game...zzzz...sorry I fell asleep just thinking about it.

    hildegarde,
    Thanking China for taking care of the environment is grounds for being committed to an asylum!

    Oh well poor Prince Philip is just playing politics and all of those ridiculous actors need to stick to the same old scripts.

    inside our hands,
    I loved YoYo Bear, Yogi Bear's cousin from Japan, who said in what would be politically incorrect these days,
    "Must-hav-peek-ka-neek-basket!"

    What I find disturbing about the Bushisms is that this is a family who has had 3 generations graduate from Yale...so much for higher edumakayshon.

    miss cellania,
    NO! You didn't? That is awesome!
    I love it when I do that..blurt out something that I have dreading...which happens all of the time because I am so persnickety about langwidge!
    I'm goin' fonetik anyday now, anyday now, I shall be released.

    chaucer's bitch,
    It was well worth the wait because I love that sort of tomfoolery.
    Anytime.

    insider,
    Don't apolomojize fer spellin or tiepan.

    menchie,
    Oh there is more that, this is why the entire world and one half of the US cannot believe that this guy is actually the Prezimadant.

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  13. HAHAHAHAHAHA @Yogi Bear!!

    Keshi.

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  14. No wonder George Dubya and our Prime Minister of Australia are such good mates. John Howard is always choking on his own foot too. Its scary to think that both of these men are in charge of our countries.

    As for Prince Philip, he is the King of Gaffes and should be sent off to Gaffeland where he can reign supreme and cause no further embarrassment to the Royal Family.

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  15. What about John Yogi-Bear? He invented the television, y'know.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/history/historic_figures/baird_logie.shtml

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  16. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GiS8tkBqf3Q

    ...we were all thinking of doing it - you all know it's true...

    (I'm still here you see. I'm LURKING.)

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  17. You were actually incarnated? The world has never been the same since.

    It's amazing Dubya has actually run that country for not just one, but -- count 'em -- two terms.

    Are ALL of those quotations accurate?

    We know how stupid he LOOKS when he tries to actually talk rather than read from a script, but if he's actually said all of those things, we all ought to cry...

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  18. I held a civilian pilots licence for a extended period of time, while i was learning out at Baccus Marrsh Aerodrome.. A student coming into land identied himself as call sign Echo YOGI Uniform, about 5 seconds later of aviation channels you hear

    "Hey Hey Boo Boo".



    "It's deja vu all over again"
    it could be worse he could be suffering from Deja Moo, being positive you have seen that cow before.

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  19. I was totally surprised that there were so many Yogis listed on the Interweb because in my world there are only three...

    There's one more: a sandwich and yogurt restaurant called Hogi Yogi. I've never eaten there myself. The only 2 AZ locations are on the other side of town. There's a whole bunch of them in Utah.

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  20. my favourite has always been:

    "I believe that man and the fish can coexist peacefully."

    the man is not only barely luminated, he is the anti-prophet to boot.


    but at least he put the adverb after the verb; not everyone does that nowadays.

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  21. I preferred Bobo myself

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  22. I don't think Bush will ever know what harm he's done to this world because he believes that "You never know what your history is going to be like until long after you're gone."

    More Bushisms

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  23. I love Yogi Bear. Whoever dubbed his voice, I want to know that guy. Nobody speaks that way anymore. Everyone should have a Bobo.

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  24. Yogi was great, Bush is...incomprehensible...but neither of them hold a candle to the great, the only, the best....
    GRACIE ALLEN!!!!
    the woman was a genius!

    Yogi Bears little buddy was BOO BOO, not BoBo, gentle readers. yes i spent entirely too much time in front of the television as a child, thankyou.

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  25. yogi bear...watever happend to him. Man...cartoons are gone forever...

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  26. what makes you think we were talking about Boo Boo? BoBo is a completely different entirely more cool and exciting bear from somewhere different and entirely more cool.

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  27. Im missing ya :(

    Keshi.

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  28. i didn't realise all those quotes came from one person, i've heard them all!
    as for dubya... i'm waiting for him to start using "complexitivity"...

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  29. Hello from a new blogger.
    You've got an interesting blog! It's a pleasure to go through it.:)

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  30. The Bushism's would be funny if not true. The most powerful man in the world..think about that. :O

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