Thursday, March 01, 2007

EYE Y'EYE Y'EYE!
Most of us guys* (*Average Overweight North American Caucasian Heterosexual Schleps over 30 Years Of Age ) should never be allowed to purchase any clothing items including even eyewear without supervision.
Most of us reluctantly get eye glasses because we* need them and put very little thought into it.
First of all it is hard to strike the Blue Steel pose when you are wearing glasses.



Sometimes glasses can make you look smarter, but not always...
a case in point, my buddy WW is boldly displaying his GIANT 80s FRAMES..WOW ..don't these babies 'scream',


"I picked these out all by myself!"!

Now if you removed them he has a real Clint Eastwood thing goin' on doesn't he?



Had he chosen the timeless Rich & Powerful Frames made famous by the likes of

Cary Grant, Aristotle Onassis, or this Guinea Pig ,

he might not look so bizarre 20 years later.


Without seeking expert advice on the perfect frames for your face it is easy, some might say guaranteed, that men* will leap over that fine line between Coolish and Foolish. Why don't they teach fashion 101 to boys starting in Kindergarten? Is there some kind of conspiracy in place so that women can snicker in the lunch room at work and say OMG did you see what he* wore today? If a guy* looks 'pulled together' the gals just assume that his 'significant (M)other' dressed him or he is Gay.


Yes even something as simple as purchasing eyewear can go horribly wrong without the proper supervision.

See what I mean..


Should men* ever be allowed to pick out any item of clothing without supervision.

27 comments:

  1. Just don't wear socks with sandals.

    That's all I ask.

    And Martin Scorsese's new look should be up there too with the heavy dark rims. He's looking more and more like Woody Allen.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Is that Hugh Hefner beside WW?

    ReplyDelete
  3. mj,
    I promise to never wear socks with sandals when you are around.
    Crikey that does look like Hef!

    ReplyDelete
  4. HE,
    Case in point, I made over my hubby's wardrobe slowly but methodically immediately after getting married. Now he just makes me choose though I will admit his taste has improved dramatically over the years.

    No-nos:
    - agree with MJ, sandals with socks, sheesh
    - high waists
    - black shoes, white socks (noooooooo)

    ReplyDelete
  5. I pay very little attention to what my husband wears. I fell in love with him while he wore what he wanted, why should I want to change it? I only tease him a little bit about wearing so much Rip Curl clothing!

    ReplyDelete
  6. No bow ties.

    And definitely no Spandex. Unless you are a Superhero.

    ReplyDelete
  7. No Hitler moustaches.

    Or porn taches.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I've always thought you had the look of Pee Wee Herman with a thyroid problem, glasses or not.

    I'm really gettin' a lot of mileage outta this pic, huh? Maybe MJ'll pick it up for her weekly roundup!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous5:04 pm

    Oh, oh, that is a tricky question, LOL, I am going to skip this one.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Here's a little tip: Just because a white shirt matches white shorts doesn't mean that they should be worn together. My husband put this outfit once and I made him go back upstairs and change. He looked like a painter. Same goes with black...unless it's for a funeral.

    ReplyDelete
  11. WW: Pee-wee Herman is the exception to the "no bow tie" rule.

    Post your pic on my weekly "Blogging Roundup?" Good idea! Next to the Hugh Hef monkey pic. It will read, "Separated at Birth?"

    ReplyDelete
  12. Yes. I appreciate the free entertainment.

    ReplyDelete
  13. That is a crack up mate!! My son, age 7, has been making these eyewears out of paper every night and then cutting them out, decorating them and putting them on his sisters. I must say, they are a sight better than the ones displayed in these images, LOL.
    I am too scared to show him any pics of Elton John and his fancy glasses :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. LOL HE u crack me up!

    WW does look like Clint Eastwood after all :):) WOW!


    And that Guinea Pig in glasses had me ROFL at work hahahaha!


    Men should never be allowed to buy any clothing w.o. supervision, especially when they buy something for a girl. gawwwd my couzn bro bought this dorky lookin shirt for his GF for her bday and she really cried.


    Keshi.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I had the exact same pair of glasses in the 70's and I had help picking them out! Of course it was my mom...maybe she was trying to keep the boys away?

    ReplyDelete
  16. menchie,
    My wife vetos stuff if we are going out in public but if we are entertaining I like to dress like Elton John on LSD in the tackiest Vegas whorehouse at about 4am...ish.


    stace,
    Aaah you are soo sweet...once the honeymoon blinders fall off you'll start sprucing him up...just wait. Oh sure you swore that you'd never do it right..right.
    It is a universal phenomenon and there is no shame in capitulating.

    mj,
    My ass looks like a bag of rocks in spandex.
    Hitler's moustache was known as a 'toothbrush' which was all the rage, don't forget that Charlie Chaplin had one too, unfortunately after single handidly inventing the Second World War, Hitler and his moustache have fallen out of favor with the human race.

    without eyewear sensibilities,
    You obviously have no idea of how funny that picture of you is...I am still laughing 24 hours later...anyway I sure hope that you make mj's highlight reel next week...do you still have them?

    hildegarde,
    C'mon don't be a chicken..confess..CONFESS..
    you pick out his clothes don't you!

    ms val,
    Why do we men love that monochromatic look..does it look more like a uniform or is it simple the path of least effort...that white on white is right out of an Officer and a Gentleman and Top Gun!

    mj,
    Paging Mr. Herman ha-HA!
    PW gets to wear a bow tie...damn straight.
    Nice touch with the whole monkey separated at birth thing..that's gold kiddo..let's run it, front page!

    kevin charnas,
    HAHA!
    Free? Isn't it always at somebody else's expense..((snicker))..but seriously few things in life are as rewarding..as long as you're on the inside.

    cazzie,
    Well I think that your son is going to find out about Elton and you don't want to squash his imagination..so just let him design eyewear for the family that can only be worn around the house..because it is SOOO special.

    keshiroo,
    WW does look like a young Clint Eastwood! Actually I am just as surprised as you are!
    Now I think that most men actually ask for help when they are buying for a lady friend..its the weird crap that they pick out for themselves that is scary!

    laurie,
    We all had terrible glasses back then..why did the frames get so frickin' HUGE anyway? WTH?

    btw: Nobody has mentioned that Men's clothing hasn't changed in 100 years.

    ReplyDelete
  17. mebbe he forgot to ask.

    btw WW looks like Arnie...duncha think so?


    Keshi.

    ReplyDelete
  18. keshi,
    NEIN!
    WW ees a Girlyman..if he took off his shirt he would start a FLABBALANCHE!

    ReplyDelete
  19. No, I think Keshi's got it right. Clint or Ahnie. I trust the judgment of such a beautiful woman.

    Hey, Mon! I'm no Girlymon!

    Flabbalanche? Cmon...

    MJ:

    You go for it, girl!!! (Actually, I think you kind of silently spurred all this on, didn't you?)

    ReplyDelete
  20. umm... i'm going to be deliberately vague.
    i think its very definitely down to the individual... some guys have no clue- others often get it right.
    i do think they should be more open to criticism (i mean advice) though, in my experience, all men tend to get all touchy if you even vaguely qhestion their clothing choice.

    ReplyDelete
  21. this is really intriguing. Once i went shopping to buy some cloths for the festival and came home with a dark green and red tshirt with blue collars with the word BOBO written at the back. Those were the naive days. Nowadays I just buy dark blue shirts. Yep...its a universal fact 99% of then men cant but stuff.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Pick out clothes?
    No.
    Pick up clothes?
    Yes, off the bedroom floor...

    ReplyDelete
  23. Pleated waistband trousers with a big expanse of beer gut hanging over them are a no-no for men. I think I may have left that comment somewhere else ... it had to happen my comments.

    Also, the person next to Within Without in the gallery of pictures is obviously George Burns.

    ReplyDelete
  24. without an excuse,
    mj did start it all!
    I joked about your girth so that all of your fans would rush in defend you..
    poor wittle guy!

    angel,
    They do and it is because most of us are so bad at it and we are constantly reminded of it...the real problem is that we sdon't get a lot to choose from..
    Men's Fashion is designed by 100 monkeys locked in a room with crayons (3 colors) and a roll of paper.

    ghosty,
    OK now we all have to see your BOBO shirt! C'mon.

    cream,
    Yes.
    Why don't women have an 'on the go pile'?
    Wait did you mean pickin' up your clothes after some hubba hubba?

    betty,
    Pleats are not a good thing (so I am told) and do nothing but emphasize how stupid we look in them. To men pleats seem like such a snappy looks like I ironed these suckers thing that they are irresistable.

    ReplyDelete
  25. it was 10 years ago....im finding for the shirt...or ill just draw one in paint.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Omg. All that and I just want to see that Bobo shirt. That had me laughing so damn hard.

    And yes, I buy my bf's clothes because he's stylistically challenged and although he spent years in art school I think he's color blind.

    ReplyDelete
  27. WW u do look like Arnie...I told u that when we first me..rem? :)


    HE u r funny man :):)

    Keshi.

    ReplyDelete

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