Friday, September 29, 2006


Tonight I went to pick up my eldest son who just started working at a Used (gently read) Book Store.
While I was there I dropped off a huge box of musty text books to be recycled and enjoyed in someone else's basement.

As we were leaving, the owner, an indefatigable champion of outdated information, ran after me and and as a sign of his appreciation, thrust a large, blue, fancy schmancy book the size of a medicine cabinet into my hands.

Well you can imagine my utter surprise when I read the title!

I confess that my Spanish isn't perfect but I am fairly certain that in English it translates as...

A Retard Of A Leader


  1. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!

    That's what the translation SHOULD BE, and I like your interpretation.

    However, hombre, Hola! The literal translation, as I suspect you know, is...

    Portrait of a Leader

    I assume you now will actually attempt to read it, translating one word at a time?

    My Spanish-English dictionary is at your disposal, Conquistador Coppens.

    (You always could have asked Carmenzta)

    Buenos Noches, Senorita Homos Escapeonos

  2. Picture of lider (according to babelfish) think lider might mean leader..... Your translation is slightly more accurate though.

  3. One of my American friends christened his cock "George Bush Jnr".

    He's grown to be the slowest, most stupid cock, apparently.

  4. Oh, darn. i was just about to ask where I oculd buy a copy, that is until i read w/in/w/out's translation. i'm not interested any more.

  5. HE
    "I think you got it right!"


  6. Listen, children, to a story
    That was written long ago,
    'Bout a kingdom on a mountain
    And the valley-folk below.

    ... more of the same ...

    Go ahead and hate your neighbor,
    Go ahead and cheat a friend.
    Do it in the name of Heaven,
    You can justify it in the end.
    There won't be any trumpets blowing
    Come the judgement day,
    On the bloody morning after....
    One tin soldier rides away.

  7. homo run,

    I hate how he always has that smug look on his face. You know the one.

    Where he's looking at something off in the disance with this look of achievement and satisfaction.

    Congrats to your son on the new job.

  8. Well, when you sneak in a little thought about Dorian Gray, it becomes even funnier.

    I always like to remind my Texas-loving acqquaintances that the Texas Republic was founded by two dumbassed Virginia land speculators whom even we Commonwealthers couldn't stand.

  9. OK, dammit, you insulted our President, and we, the most powerful nation on this Earth, will not stand for it! Our intelligence services insist there are no weapons of mass destruction anywhere in Canada, which means you're hiding them somewhere, so we are coming in to get them, so, in accordance with the Patriot Act, you are hereby required to inform us which province of Canada you reside in so that we can minimize the expense of invading your terrorist stronghold and bring you freedom and democracy. We don't have enough troops to occupy the entire country. Oh, and have the maple syrup ready.

  10. Oh . . . er . . . . ummm . . . . I live in Quebec, yeah, that's it, yeah . . . in Celine Dion's home, yeah, right, yes, Celine Dion's house. Can't miss it. Lots of shattered glass in the neighboring structures.

    Bring it on!

  11. OK!
    M'lady he loves this stuff!
    Let the poor guy chortle for a while.

    Thank You SIR!
    I don't trust Babelfish..I think that its the CIA and they are just collecting subversive conversations and killer recipes for Laura.

    hey farmer giles!
    I am so sorry to hear that..well atleast we know that won't stop him from being president of the coop someday.

    chaucer's bitch,
    I am so sorry, ww spoiled it for all of us! If only he hadn't googled retardo!

    See ww thinks he was being mr journalisto by clarifying what retardo means in english..geez now I am startin' to get mad.
    What a goody two shoes eh?

    bravo mj!
    Ok now I must go back to my music library..hold on a sec...and look under the Cs... aha... there it is Coven....
    Excellent choice. Why haven't any of those wanker bands remade this puppy???? I know that you are tight with David Foster so ring him up and get somebody like Charlotte Church who needs a big crossover hit to get away from her eunich chanting or whatever..I suppose it was catalogued as ancient or mideival choral..oops I am rambling...Awesome song mj!

    He is lookin' at something in the distance..his conscience...or he is just trying to remember where he put his car keys....over there on the kitchen counter by the missile launch codes.

    Please do go on. Hey wait a minute...Commonwealthers?
    I thought we were Commonwealthers and you guys were Colonists? No we are Communists and you guys are Neoplatonists ...Or is it the other way around...
    hap ma fronty hap me!

    THE michael,
    QUEBEC! no really.
    Go get 'em us when you are firmly entrenched and trhe area is secured...go on shoo shoo...your boys will love it..way easier than Iraqistan.. love it I tells ya .
    .you can buy beer in corner stores just like the USA...
    oh and let the troops know that the french word for beaver is castor...they can make lots of jokes about canada to the canadian prisoners.. come to think of it that is probably more INTEL than the Pentagon already has on Canada .
    .oh and by the way the F word sounds exactly the same..its pretty much a universal term...
    call me!

    absoleutement! You are a genius!
    LOL the shattered glass!!!

    Too bad she is winding down her career in Vegas
    her name is pronounced selynn in quebec and saleeeen everywhere else...

  12. Hee hee hee -- thanks for the groin. I mean, grin. (That was a legitimate typo.)

  13. aaahndrayah,
    Dios Mio!
    Me spanglish not so goody

    ay carumba!

  14. Nice interpretation, You haven't lost the touch one bit, I often read your posts and enjoy them, keep them coming:)

  15. LOL If that isn't the right title IT SHOULD BE! The good thing about having a book that big, about Dubya. When you burn it this winter it'll keep you warm for a couple hours. ;)

  16. Love the comments, love your title H.E. You guys always bring a smile to my face.

  17. Sorry to confuse you, but there are 46 states and 4 commonwealths, so to speak.

    And Celine's name down here is pronounced YEEEEAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  18. apparently he speaks spanish.

  19. This is why everyone thinks Dubya is such an idiot. He never looks worried. He's always content. How can you be content when you're fighting a couple wars, and the world is going to hell?

  20. Hey, Amigo Retardo, I was just being your Jiminy Cricket. Go ahead, shoot the messenger.

    Wouldn't want you disseminating incorrect information and having Dubya turn his War on Terror against the entire Spanish-speaking world.

    I wonder if, when he saw the book, he also figured Retrato meant Retard?


    Either you're calling me square or you meant to say W Squared...

    The Michael:

    Homo Escarpment lives in the province of Manitoba. But then so do I, so go easy on us when you invade.

    And be warned: we have terrible winters, lots of garter snakes and thousands upon thousands of Canada Geese and will be a formidable foe.

  21. LMAO! That was the biggest laugh I had all weekend! Thank you! And what's with everyone being so anxious to give up Quebec? I'm in Quebec. :(

  22. Anna's in Quebec? Damn! Oh, wait, I have the perfect solution......if the enemy is in one province, you pour your resources into one nearby, throwing off the terrorists, so that they think you're an idiot, so that when they get complacent, and want to visit Disneyland, you can nail them all right there with the help of Goofy and the seven dwarves. Relax, Anna, if the real problem is in Quebec, it's safe. Well go after Newfoundland, we're sure something fishy is going on there.

  23. You can Grand Banks on it >B^D>

  24. "I hate how he always has that smug look on his face. You know the one.

    Where he's looking at something off in the disance with this look of achievement and satisfaction."

    Is that what he's supposed to be doing? I always thought he looked like he was taking a paricularly stubborn dump.

    If the words "Bendejo" and "Puto" do not appear at least once in that book, it is inaccurate and should be corrected by liberal application of rubber stamps saying same. 48-point block type, all caps.

  25. Calling Shrub a whore? Isn't that a bit strong? Nope, not at all >B^D>

  26. stud
    Hey how are you? I had better see what you are up to these days..

    nekked nerd,
    Great idea but the content may cause a noxous odor when ignited.

    Hi christine,
    Keep those party pics coming.

    I would wager that you are the only living Merkin who is 'hip' to that fact.
    Does this mean that you do not have a craving for Celeeeeen Deeeeon in your swimsuit area?

    hey treespotter,
    Despite degrees from Harvard and Yale my guess is that his Spanglish is as guud as hiz Merkin.

    andonalighternote blogger,
    Weird eh? Ignorance is bliss.

    with squared,
    Quit giving away free information!

    You're kidding me right? Does the phrase 'le fly dans les oitment' ring any bells?

    THE michael,
    I told you there isn't anyone left in Newfoundland..they have all moved to Alberta. Knock yourself out...and turn off the lights when you leave.

    I am glad that you said what needed to be said. The elephant in the room...

    LOL C'mon you think that his one time tomado del prologo Karen Hughes would write something sycophantic?

    Just wait until I get my hands on some Swedish or Kalahari
    (clicking sounds) books to critique. I won't be getting a job as a UN interpreter.

  27. that is certainly an understatement.

  28. The thought of Celine Dion in any sort of sexual or sensual context leaves me feeling shrivelled, barren of any feeling, and generally suicidal. Luckily, I tried the thought only in the same way that G. Gordon Liddy held his hand over a candle . . . wait, he probably got off on that. Let me rephrase: I tried the thought of Celine Dion only in the same way that one might test their ability to hold one's breath or to withstand some other physical discomfort.

    I'd probably do better holding my breath.

  29. ghosty,
    Sadly this is like shooting fish in a barrel..I can't wait until the US has a REAL President and we only complain about excessive Super Bowl Halftime Shows....sigh

    frontier editHER,
    OOOh la la! Hit a nerve with that one...
    G Gordon Liddy...didn't he eat rats to overcome his fear of them?
    Celeeeen Deeeeon is a natural treasure and I dare not say anything more...listen we have another gal named Shan-eye-yah. I'll send her instead. Just don't try to tell me that she is Country.

  30. I can't wait until the Dems take the house and senate and ITMFA! <---ITMFA as seen on bumper stickers all over my town...
    (starts with Impeach and ends with Already)


  31. Send her on down HE. At least she speaks English without sounding like Maurice Chevalier, hoh, hoh, hoh

  32. tidal grrrl,
    I hope that he doesn't get way with this..but he has surrounded himself with such big, fat, juicy SCAPEGOATS...Rummy, Rove and Cheney will satisfy the angry mob while Dubya is exiled to his ranch in Texas where he will spend the rest of his days lickin' gila monsters and clearin' brush.

    frontier editor,
    sorry Shan-eye-ahhh is gone too. Anybody who makes it big, leaves! Shania ilives in Switzerland, Celine in Las Vegas, Bryan Adams..France,..and every other famous Canadian lives in Hollywood...
    do you see a trend?

  33. Yes, I do. The Lorne Green School of Broadcasting is performing its evil function of colonizing the world.

    One day it will be just like in "Dune," when Alan Thicke and the Benny Hill-eret finish training the CBC tundra people and one calls his name and blows a chunk out of a Molson's bottle.

    "My name has become a killing word," Thicke will think to himself.

    Uh, what did I just write?

  34. fronty,
    You said.
    "My name has become a killing word," Thicke will think to himself.
    What the hell does that mean..

  35. Go watch "Dune," my son (figuratively speaking, of course)


Danke für das Kommentieren/Gracias por comentar/Merci du commentaire/Вы для комментария/Thank You for commenting/Σας ευχαριστώ για το σχολιασμό/Grazie per commentare/Tak for kommentaren...

click yer cursor matey...


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...