Tuesday, July 11, 2006

PSYHCLISTS

They weave and they wobble,
they teeter, they doddle,
they are cyclists out on parade.
In their bright shiny costumes,
inhaling exhaust fumes,
an uneasy truce, a charade.

I am not covered in scars,
safely ensconced in my car,
how they love being seen as contrarian.
You're not saving the planet,
stay out of traffic gawdammit,
you're lucky I'm not octogenarian.

Like a bipedal sponge,
that absorbs vapor grunge,
must we share roads with these treehuggers?
Scrubbing more C O 2,
than the space shuttles do,
watch out for those goofy buggers.

Though the air they may filter,
they keep traffic off kilter,
and ignore basic self preservation.
They are so frickin slow,
fueling road rage, they blow,
where in hell is that natural selection?

Politically correct?,
no I'm madder than heck,
as you finally fade from my view.
Get your ass into gear,
OH CRAP there goes my mirror,
I'd stop but I'm late 'cause of you!




16 comments:

  1. If you don't like my bike
    You can take a hike

    ReplyDelete
  2. If you can go 50,
    then that would be nifty,
    and STAY ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!
    not the middle lane,
    quit being be a pain,
    you cyclist will drive us insane!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Spoken like a poet,
    and did'nt even know it.
    I'd ride my bike but 50km's to work
    is a bit of a stretch, and Arctic is still in training for pulling a sleigh.
    What about a horse you ask? well i can just see a car slipping on its poo and running into you.
    I am a truck owner and proud of it and remember me when you need to haul something. Most of you do.....

    ReplyDelete
  4. That was very good.... FUNNY!
    But do you really not like
    all those bicylists?
    I am one of them...
    A good rider though!

    ReplyDelete
  5. make more sidewalks, i bike on them even if i'm not supposed to...

    ReplyDelete
  6. Not bad. The outfits kill me. Are they really into riding, or just wearing spandex? If you want to look like some retarded Jockey, get a horse. I can respect a slow conveyance that can throw me a FU look along with its rider.

    ReplyDelete
  7. err!
    What abt people who use buses;-)

    ReplyDelete
  8. 'Oh how I love the bikes!
    Not really but just the guys' ;-)


    Good poetry there matey :)

    Keshi.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I was behind a guy on a goddamn bike this morning and EVERYONE is changing lanes to get around the guy. Go up on the curb dumbass. It's 8 in the morning, no one is walking on the sidewalk. And the busses have to deal with them too. They have to stay in the right lane for stops, but also need to get around the bikers, so it's just a real bitch for them too.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Great one HE. Loved it.

    ReplyDelete
  11. damn...so true....

    My bike,
    in the garage,
    collecting mites...

    ReplyDelete
  12. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Passionate, inflamatory, derogatory - it has everything except perfectly consistent meter, but it's really not bad.

    And I think that the sometimes drifting meter is just a metaphor for the careening, ill advised movements of cyclists - am I right, or am I right?

    ReplyDelete
  14. Hmm. Some finally wrote poetry. For starters it good. Most write love poetry in the beginnings!

    ReplyDelete
  15. hodedoo,
    Atleast you have those big ass mirrors on your truck to 'encourage' cyclists to stay off to the side!

    samuru999,
    There are no bad bicycles just bad owners...oh..quite frankly I find it an intolerable situation.

    christine,
    Finally the voice of reason crying in the wilderness, thank you!

    kid,
    Greetings kid. Be my guest the sidewalks would be fine and even better drive a car.

    breakerslion,
    Those super hero costumes are ridiculous..especially with the wind flaps hangin' over the sides..bleh! And the butt sweat stains eew!

    anand,
    I love people on buses. It is hard to catch forty winks on a bike like you can on a bus...but I've seen people try.

    keshi,
    Yeah, yeah..but what is the ratio of nice buns to obscene mud flap bums? 20 to 1?

    anonymous,
    Ooh it is a total pain in the ass to molly coddle these reckless oblivious fools and I cringe when I watch them use up their nine lives in one city block. DUH!

    don,
    Since you are a real poet I will take that as a compliment. Although I won't hold it against you if you try to dissuade my foray into your sacred realm.

    ghost,
    You have proven time and time again to be a brilliant realist. Well done.

    darius,
    YES! My unconventional approach was specifically designed to metaphorically mimic the bizarre unpredictability of cyclists.

    Man you are smart, nobody else got that!

    gautaumi,
    I LOVE to rant about cyclists so infact it is about Love.

    ReplyDelete

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