Tuesday, June 01, 2010

GRAPEVINE GOSPEL

Do you know what I don't understand?

Why on earth would (insert personal deity of choice here) decide to only tell one dude about all of his rules & regulations, and then expect everybody else to know exactly what he said to that guy?


No, really?!
Why not just tell everyone at the same time?

That way, nobody could make up any weird sh*t about food and clothes and blowing yourself up.

Just sayin'.

15 comments:

  1. Well Donnie because gog RELIES on people to make up chyt you see? If it revealed all it knew to everyone, we'd be gogs too, and what would that make it? Useless. Gog knew what it was doing, my friend. Besides, would YOU want to know what gog knows? Hell, no.

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  2. Perhaps logic had not then been "invented."
    An aside: in LOL Catspeak, cats refer to their Ceiling Cat as "Cod." Probably where we get the expression "codswallop."

    I think I need a drink...

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  3. whadya think He invented the internet for? He speaks to us all everyday via this medium. You can't get much clearer than that. Honestly Donn, are you not paying attention?

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  4. ha ha ha (*manic laughter*)

    Vicus stole my comment!!!!

    (-:

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  5. Actually Donn, He does tell us all the same thing. The problem comes when folks start listening to what other folks say God is saying. That's when the 'bollocks' starts happening.

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  6. Yeah, why doesn't God have his own blog?
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
  7. Questions, questions, questions?
    Who do you think I am? Some kind of almighty power?
    Be quiet, I'm having a nap.

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  8. CATHY
    I had not realised that we were supposed to make our own sh*t up? In that case, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
    ..and yes I would like to know all the stuff he knows.

    MOREIDLETHOUGHTS
    Thank You..atleast I know what Ceiling Cat is doing. Have you read the LOLcat Bible?

    http://www.lolcatbible.com/index.php?title=Main_Page

    VICUS
    I guess that some things in this world are just too obvious..there it is right under my nose. I wonder why most of the Interwebs is used for porn? ..and here I thought that was a bad thing?

    ILTV
    Great minds think alike :)
    You need to record your maniacal laughter on YouTube.

    TOM
    Why do people trust other people to deliver message? You'd think that by now, with the dismal track record and all, that most folks would ignore the "prophets"?

    SCARLS
    I think he's worried that HE wouldn't get as many readers as Girl With A One Track Mind?

    GOD
    ((audible gasp))
    *hides under desk

    ReplyDelete
  9. Where's the like button?

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  10. Maybe Bog has a mulitple personality disorder and s/he goes around saying different stuff to different people and s/he doesn't want to say it to a crowd in case s/he looked mad ... erm is this theory holding up?

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  11. Gog will get you for that, Donn.

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  12. I heard the guy that tells the rest speaks "ex catedra", i.e. with full authority and infallibly true.

    The thing is that there's always something missing with these representatives and middle persons. Or maybe they made the rules themselves and the rest just believe them?

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  13. God speaks--it's just hard to hear him with all these a$$holes making noise like they know what God's saying in an effort to make themselves look better. All most of us end up hearing is crap.

    But every now and then, you hear God clearly in a beautiful piece of music, the gleeful laughter of a small child, or the sounds of the waves washing up on the shore. You hear God's voice too when you listen to something that tells you to turn left instead of right, avoiding an accident; or don't eat that three day old takeout, avoiding a night nausea, vomiting, and lower GI distress.

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  14. Donn, you're a genius.

    Lead me.

    But if there's any blowing up to be done I want to see the virgin men first, ok?

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  15. If he did then evangelicals would be out of a job and then hair product sales would plummet and what would we do with all those extra cable networks? And what would we put in otherwise empty drawers in hotel room nightstands? It's a delicate balance.

    ReplyDelete

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