Wednesday, January 27, 2010

EVILution
Only 39% of Americans believe in Evilution!




In a recent Gallop poll , 25% admitted that they do NOT believe in Evolution.

Even more baffling is that 36% don't even have an opinion...1% don't know if they have an opinion

Only about half of Americans aged 18 to 34 say they believe in evolution.


(I added the quip but props to Propps)


The pollster summarized these findings with this stunning revelation;
"Americans' religious beliefs are a significant predictor of their attitudes toward Darwin's theory!"

Ya think?



"There is a strong relationship between education and belief in Darwin's theory, as might be expected, ranging from 21% of those with high-school educations or less,
 to 74% of those with postgraduate degrees."




The Good News for Modern Man is that 55% of Americans believe in "the Rapture," 
so before our world ends, those who denounce Darwinsky, will be spared and mysteriously taken up to Heaven in the blink of an eye.

I am presuming that after "the Rapture",  
the stats for the 36 percenters without an opinion on Evolution, will dramatically decrease.
Those poor "left behinders" will be much too busy looting the vacant homes and bank accounts of the Faithful to answer stupid surveys on Evilution.

23 comments:

  1. What are my chances of getting a plasma TV after the Rapture?

    At least I'll finally be able to get a seat on the bus.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Who you gonna make fun of after the Rapture? Didn't think of that one, didja?

    ReplyDelete
  3. The Rapture just means more shoes for me!

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  4. So, I can loot my neighbor's house when he gets a hernia???

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  5. Evolution is shit. God made all this after a serious drinking spree with his mates. Look around and tell me something different, eh?

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  6. after The Rap, I'm moving to Iceland

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  7. Excellent point! Plenty more room for us Darwinian-devils after the "rapture" talk about a misnomer! I always had a suspicion people were mostly lead around by the nose of MatthewMarkLukeJohn - but it's so disheartening to realize they're all such idiots. Here we've had proof beyond doubt of our origins, and someone decides "Lucy" was really "Eve" of the garden variety. I can't fathom how an otherwise normal human would actually think earth is about 5000 yrs old because of what someone in the mideast heard someone say about 100 years before someone else heard someone say it 2000 yrs ago...etc ad inf. Biblical boobery makes me cringe in shame.

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  8. welcome back to the land of the living, sugar! ;~D xoxoxo

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  9. So... where's Canada on that poll? Or do we not have an opinion of any kind???

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  10. I believe in the Rapture I saw Jurassic Park

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  11. Well of course not all Americans believe we got here through evolution.

    Some Americans believe we got here through UFOs!

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  12. Forget about the rapture, they need to add a poll question:

    Do you believe humans are DE-volving?

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  13. Debbie Harry/Blondie sang about the Rapture.....

    Love the Jesus and Rex pic and quip as well as the "Answers/Genesis" quote....too funny!

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  14. Hey! Where's New Zealand on that graph?

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  15. Tsk. I was beaten to the Blondie comment.
    Sx

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  16. I think it's in the Planets' best interest to wall off the U.S. now before we infect the rest of them with the idiocity virus. We'll have eaten all our young and each other within two decades (oh, yes, how long do you think THIS generation is going to last without it's Chinese goods?) and then the rest of the world can move in and recycle whatever is left.

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  17. I am making a list of things I want to steal after the rapture , mind you there are not many god fearin chosen few in the UK , but I think the corner shop is run by born agains and I have first dibs on the ciggy and drink counters

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  18. looting bank accounts?
    there won't be use for money after the rapture.

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  19. I could have told you that Americans were less evolved.

    And really, this whole Rapture business? I mean, how good can it be? I've multiple-orgasmed over 30 times in under an hour, and I seriously doubt the Rapture is better than that. Jesus may be coming, but it probably wasn't as good as I did.

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  20. where are youuuuuu?
    gone on the ship? the bus?
    saving the world??
    wait for me, donn!!!!!

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  21. I totally believe in evolution and think that God is a heap of BS that people invent to justify their lives and decisions.

    Sorry if I offend anyone, but hey, it's just one opinion. Like yours! :)

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  22. Ah but do those who don't know what to believe have FAITH in that?

    Great poster of our Lord by the way. I'm sure he loves the dinosaurs too.

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  23. I live in an area where the naysayers just might be an even higher, much higher, percentage of the local population. I guess it doesn't hurt your head as much if you don't have to use your brain so hard.

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