Tuesday, September 09, 2008


Hopefully you have no problem identifying the following odours; strawberry, smoke, soap, menthol, clove, pineapple, natural gas, lilac, lemon, and leather, because researchers have discovered that those of us who cannot may go on to develop Alzheimers, the most infamous form of Dementia. It is estimated that three per cent of people over 65, and up to twenty per cent of those over 85, suffer from this horrible disease. The thought of losing my thoughts terrifies me.

Like most of you I treasure learning, experiences, knowledge, and self discovery above accumulating and hoarding material possesions..damn right I'm bitter...the prospect of fading to black is a terrifying proposition. There are other lesser known but equally sinister forms of Dementia many of which have regretably been discovered by men with weird names...how would you like to be told that you may have Binswangers?

LIFE is a predominantly isolated journey that is primarily experienced in your mind..except when you say stupid things out loud.

There is little doubt that after hundreds of thousands of years of evolutionary tweaking, most Homo Escapeons arrive more-or-less pre-programmed to do two things; 1. wallow in delight at the suffering of another and 2. if they absolutely have to, co-operate with others, but only if it benefits them somehow.

Any of you remember Maslow's hierarchy of needs from your Intro to Psychology? This thingamabob..

Far too many of us are currently under the impression that there is a direct correlation betwixt a person's disposable income, and gaining access up in the la-di-f*cking-da Blue area. That may be true to a degree but what I noticed over the past 50 years, is that so many of the 1% of the population (f*cking cheaters!) that get there, lose a lot of Yellow..well obviously not the SEX part you ninny, but the intimacy. That's the best part of SEX right?

Oh sure "those people" have Orange & Red up the Wazoo, but if you don't have friends or especially intimacy, who cares if you're self*ckingactualized?

How many of you thought to yourself, "Hmmm well if I was financially independent and at the top of my field, I suppose that I could make a go of it for a while?".. c'mon.. wouldn't you like to see what that feels like? How long do you think that you could stand it?
The problem with LIFE is that very few of us ever get to be self*ckingactualized never mind rich. That is why schadenfreude was invented folks. We can sit back and judge the uber rich jetsetting beautiful megalomaniacal twats and take joy in their miserable lonely empty pathetic erratic personal lives which are paraded under our noses to the Nth degree by the Media.

Maybe that dumbass chart is all upside down and being self*ckingactualized is actually the starting point for knowing who you are and how to balance all of those other things at the same time..managing all of those areas of your life simultaneously to reach a balance...what I call the Oasis of Homeostasis...aka dare I say it, Happy.

Therefore in lieu of pursuing Fame and Riches, I've always wanted to really know me and find out why the hell I'm not Famous and Rich. I love stuff like this
YOU JUST GET ME? Why? Because I don't think that we can ever learn enough about why we have failed so spectacularly, and so that we can become better consumers of Schadenfreude.


  1. you don't have time to get dementia Donnnn the world is about to be consumed by a black hole. Vicus let it out of the bag.

  2. I'm rich and famous, I have you for a mate.

    What was ya name again?

  3. i really worked hard this morning... and then i read your post... damn now i have to go read it all again cause i can't remember one damn word... *sigh*


  4. I'm smelling a gas leak right now.

  5. ZIGGI
    Today is Doomsday and we should all be deeply conCERNed. Those twits are going to tear a new arse in the space/time continuum and we're all going to unravel!

    I plan to go out while my hadron is colliding.

    Thank goodness one of you is on the ball. Send the Lear over here to pick me up post haste! And hurry before the space/time continuum dissolves!

    That's the true sign of vapid shiftless writing isn't it...
    when you are so mad at yourself for continuing to read a post long after your interest has expired.

    If you can't recall one single thing about it that tells me that you are a discerning individual with standards...
    so what are you doing here?
    *goes back to drawing board

    They don't mean that kind of Natural Gas..sheesh..try to lay off the Fava Beans and a nice Chianti, that should help.

  6. oh, yea, right, like we're supposed to balance a paramide on it's tip, and any of us are THAT steady.....dude, you makin' it hard, ya know? Just let me win the lottery or two and I'll be happily jacking up my pick-up, installing a HEMI and couple of keggers in the bed and......ah.....

    Now what?

  7. Tis a bit like the confusion of beauty with innocence and purity.

    But a beautiful man or woman can be every bit as downright evil as an ugly one!

  8. Love a man who says that intimacy is the best part of sex! Donnnn, you are so right there.

    That is what is missing in so many people's lives. They have friends to hang with, they have a good job, an income, a roof to reside under, someone to have sex with, but there is absolutely no intimacy in any of their relationships because they can't let themselves be vulnerable.

    To truly be intimate, you have to be able to open your heart and soul up for inspection. With someone you trust, someone you care about. All too often that trust is betrayed and you end up decimated. Then you can't be intimate on any level with anyone, be they a friend or a lover.

    And too many people are so callous with that trust, so they end up hurting or destroying another, sometimes inadvertently, but still with the consequences that that person will never be able to open up to anyone else again.

    Few people are even astute enough to try to understand why they failed and to learn from those experiences.

  9. Anonymous3:04 p.m.

    If you loose your mind, you won't know it right? So will it really matter? Why not treasure the mind you have right now because who knows?

    And you know, lots of those 1% who are rich and famous are still in the red part of Maslow's hierarchy: especially the excretion part when they open their mouths to speak.

  10. Once you've lost your mind, every day is an adventure.

    You meet new friends every day, go to new places, eat new foods. And you have nothing to worry about because you can't remember anything.

    What could better than that?!

    They call that getting to the point..now you know, pay it forward.

    I get all figity around handsome women and beautiful men.

    I just don't have the heart to tell you that I was being facetious, my advice to you is to just keep thinking that I am deep and sensitive. When I snap my fingers you won't remember any of this

    I would treasure my mind if it made me Rich and Famous, but it's just squatting up there, not paying rent, and buggin the hell out of me 24/7!

    I can't evict him and he knows it, little bastard!

    I'm already getting lost in the neighbourhood that I've lived in for over twenty years, that's scary enough. It might be actually be Binswangers because my BP is in the Giraffe range. Not Good.

  12. Anonymous7:52 p.m.

    That was a fun little test at the end.

    And I'm happy to see that my ability to recognize smells may be protective. Because some days I can't rememebr a damned thing.

  13. Well blow me down. I thought food, sex and s;leep were the ultimate objectives. I only mess about with creativity and self-actualization because I can't access the other stuff enough.

  14. as a result of my chosen lifestyle,, i have on several occasions moved state with just the clothes on my back.. in so doing,, i have over the course of time, learned that stuff is just stuff.. no more no less it does not in anyway really effect your true character,, in fact it can in my humble opinion only create a false sense of self in those that allow themselves to be described by it...

    today i am not rich,, but i am certainly not poor.. i have little and want for nothing more. what i do have you cannot take away for me,, and thus i do not have to fear that it will be stolen or misused by others..

    however,, genetically i stand a strong chance of getting Alzheimers as it has already taken my great grandmother and my grandmother.. my greatest fear in life i believe is that i will develop Alzheimers and my mind,, the only possession of mine i safeguard and cherish will in the end be taken from me...

    very thought provoking post dann.....

  15. whoa! wat happened to d blog. hemm...this one looks cooler. :)

  16. That was a fun test..I did it twice, the first time I lied like crazy and the second time I was totally honest.
    The first one was far more interesting so I kept that one.

    I like the way you think and I agree whole heartidly...except for the sleep.
    I only sleep when I absolutely need t...........................................................

    To quote Puff Diddy, and yes it hurts to do so, "Mo Money Mo Problems". Stuff is stuff and the more you have, the more you want, until it takes over your entire Life or gets collected by Divorce Lawyers or the IRS.

    I'm sorry to hear about your genetic component..hopefully you will avoid the descent and go out on top. I'll quote Neil Young this time, "It's better to burn out, than to fade away. Out of the Blue and into the Black."

    I think that the accelerating ghost particles from CERN swept through the space/time continuum and altered my template.

    I'm afraid to touch it in case all of the now destabilized protons in the galaxy start to get medieval on our ass.

  17. Okay... fine.... you blew my impression of you totally out of the water. I guess WW really IS the deep, sensitive one and you are just a regular guy. Or maybe you are both just regular guys and the stuff you two write is just to pull the wool over your fellow bloggers' eyes.


  18. Pyramids are just schemes to rob the naive and tombs for the dead! Bring back the 4 food groups!

    I don't know if it's worse losing your mind or losing control of your body. On the one hand, you walk around naked and have an excuse; on the other hand, someone put you in an itchy, gawd awful Xmas sweater and you can't take it off...

    The psyche test (like all psyche tests) was fun and entertaining. I've been able to deduce from my profile why I'm not rich yet:

    "You enjoy making plans and commitments but you sometimes don't follow through. You are curious about many different things and highly value artistic expressions and ingenious thoughts. You are calm and rational even in the toughest of situations. You are always polite and respectful toward others and avoid confrontation even to the point of being gullible. You are outgoing and sociable in most social situations. "

    It's true; I enjoy making plans to divorce rich, but sometimes, I don't follow through...damn my curiosity and penchant for having a good time! I coulda been the next Kevin Federline or one of J Lo's exes!

    Oh for heaven's sake, as a Fabulist my goal is to make people think about what they think that they know. Out here it is unwise to assume anything about anyone...we're all very complex (pfffft) and constantly changing.

    Oscar Wilde said, "The liar at any rate recognizes that recreation, not instruction, is the aim of conversation."

    No kidding. It's just as easy to fall in lust with a fabulously rich girl as it is to fall in love with a depressingly poor one. The fundamental right for 'the man' to collect huge alimony, is what the Feminists were fighting for.
    Good Luck with that.

  20. Oh, I know, Donnnn, I am just making small talk. What the hell! I am smart enough to know that you just like to get people's cerebral juices flowing and see if you can get them headed off on different tangents.

  21. I'm actually trying to treach my Oasis of Homeostasis, not sure my colours go in the same order
    at the pyramid of needs, hahaha.

    Oh I like your new template, it's like travelling to a different place every time you change it, lol.

  22. What was that again? How do you pronounce it? I forgot.

    You gonna teach me? Only then I will forgive you for writing.... err trying....to write poetry.

  23. so erm... the point is NOT to get to the blue part?


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