Friday, May 30, 2008

SMARTYRDUMB

"Living well is the best revenge."

George Herbert English
clergyman & metaphysical poet (1593 - 1633)


He almost got it right..'Being Content' with your lot in life is actually the greatest achievement.

Nothing is more irritating to those poor people enslaved by avarice, and completely suckered by buying into the Yuppy (née Baby Boomer) motto,

"Whoever dies with the most toys, Wins",
than seeing some 'common person' who is happy.

Having dissected my Passive-Aggressive inclinations has made me keenly aware of the shortcomings of this strategy. Why? Because the ultimate goal of PA is to die a martyr...Oooh take that!


Unfortunately the intended victim may not have ever even noticed that you were sticking it to them. Your sacrifice may be completely lost on them so where is the joy in that? Passive Aggressives demand schadenfreude..joy at another's misery..and that specifically means GUILT...
except as I said, the intended target is too self consumed to notice.
D'OH!

Therefore I have gleefully abandoned the folly of the martyrdumb route and have simply opted to make them feel miserable by being happy...
killing two birds with one stone!


When some arsehole pulls up next to me at a stoplight in a $150,000 car and deliberately flashes their uber-white veneers and $50,000 watch while they speaking loudly on their phone "Yo Speilberg" and then winks and motions towards their 'trophy' Wife's implants,
I shrug and say whatfrickinever?


People like that hate the very notion that you can be happy without 'stuff'.


They are hoarders and they can never, ever, be satiated. You can never have too much...it's a hole that can never be filled.
There is nothing wrong with having stuff, but at what cost.
Do the demands to keep the money-pump flowing cut into sharing your precious time with your loved ones...if you even have any since your focus is on acquiring as much crap as possible.


I know so many rich individuals who are miserable, empty, vessels drifting in a Sea of Greed..

"Gee, why doesn't everyone want to be me?
I mean just look at all of my expensive sh*t!
What a bunch of losers!"


To be fair, I also know a few wealthy individuals who are happy because they give and give and give some more...
and not just to show off, they do it very discreetly.


So I'm not kvetching, and once I finally win the lottery (HA!) I fully intend on being content with having enough, and quietly spreading it out, instead of spreading it THICK.
Yeah right we'll see.


Every day above ground (or outside of an Urn) is more than just a 'good day', it's another chance to make someone else happy.

Here endeth today's preachy sermon.

Now in a blatant effort to maintain this feelgood post, have a lash at some Labradoodle Puppies...so cute!






31 comments:

  1. can I have an exception for shoes?

    Can one want more shoes and still be a good person? - I'm willing to donate a body part if I can keep the shoes (as long as it's not a foot!).

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  2. i just want to be rich.

    the puppies look sad, if you haven't noticed.

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  3. I have started to like your preachy sermons. You are finally going the missionary way. Now time for you to rule over us, the heathens and the primitive ones.

    Wot say?

    *running away*

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  4. Are you taking the missionary position on this?

    To be truly happy, must I throw out my Pee-wee Herman collection?

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  5. but koala bears dont do anything! and we dont have eucalyptus trees here.


    I love this post...the world is full of pretenders. I used to think that by them buying expensive stuff...they money will trickle down to the lower economic class as well. but its a polar bear crap theory. the money nevah trickles down! the amount of dough the ceo's make is like 90% of the profit. that leaves the tea lady with 0.001% of the earnings, and the rest for the company staff. it doesnt make sense.

    i jst posted a new post. do you do tags?

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  6. The puppies are SO cute. Makes me want to scoop one up and put him in my Louis Vuitton bag.

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  7. I guess Living Well differs from person to person. To me, Living Well means having a conscience that allows me to sleep at nite. :)

    Great post Donn!

    Keshi.

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  8. This post could have been dragged out of my own subconscious. For a long time I thought that by leaving my hometown and being happy-ish I was "sticking it" to the people who made my early years a living hell. It took a long time to realise that they would never know or care where I was or what I was doing; I was the only one clinging to the past in the hope of a passive aggressive revenge. Needless to say it was never achieved, but I got past it and realised I could be happy simply on my own terms and in my own way.

    And those puppies are sooooo cuuuute!!!! I'm such a girlie girl when confronted with puppies or kittens :)

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  9. Ahh my ranting Homey love to whom I adore. I needed to read a post like this tonight and so I have and of course it had to be from you. Now I know I was not in mind when you wrote but nevertheless I love it anyway. It made me smile at the sarcasm and I love sarcasm. Well, in the nicest way that is.

    You are wonderful and I missed you so.

    I hope you are well love.

    Soft love,
    T

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  10. ZIGGI
    Here we go women and shoes...didn't I just rant about this at your place? I know that there is nothing that I can do about it so
    OK YOU CAN HAVE AN EXCEPTION FOR FOOTWEAR.

    MISTI
    Nah..those Puppies are saying take me home Donn I LOVE YOU!
    You can be rich without having a lot of money ya know..
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
    No, seriously, I read that somewhere.


    GAUTAMI
    I am fully prepared for world domination..in fact I have been training for it for weeks now.
    One of the best things about ruling the world is the fact that you get to make a lot of spontaneous speeches about whatever you want..I see guys like Castro and Bush and I think, geez I could do that?
    How do you get that job anyway?

    MJ
    I find that the Missionary position is still the most conducive configuration for being able to open my legs, close my eyes, and think of England...
    just as Alice, Lady Hillingdon so wisely prescribed.

    Pee Wee Herman paraphernalia..not the other 'alia', will be worth a lot of money some day so keep it safely hidden in your tickle trunk for your retirement fund.

    GHOSTAY
    I watched a study that suggested that Koala eat Eucalyptus to get high and that apparently makes up for the terrible nutritional value.

    When they come down they get grumpy and bummed out..so basically they're cute fuzzy crackheads.

    I'll come over and have a lash...

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  11. I was married to that person...absolutely TORE UP if someone had something 'better' than him, desparate to get the next new thing, ate up with 'looking good' and 'keeping up with the joneses'. he makes gajillion bucks in silicon valley and is in the process of offloading wife #2 and facing two more support payments and alimony to add to what he already can't afford, completely miserable, balding, wages garnished, cult member....

    oh hell yes, i love it!!

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  12. Bloody Hell mate ya would need someone ta assist ya in world domination......... I offere my services.....

    Do ya reckon the world could handle being peaceful content and happy?

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  13. Gautami! Donn the preacher. We could make serious money here Donn. Donn Koresh. :D

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  14. That arsehole in the $150,000 car?

    His blog sucks.

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  15. BLUE GENIE
    HAHA! You're a very naughty girl because you know darn well that a middle aged schlep like me, isn't about to argue about luxury brands with a comely young lass who jests about dognapping with LV accessories...ahem..
    (*OK just shutup now..
    change the subject for gawdsake)

    Est-ce que c'est votre vraie photographie? It's a Trojan Horse isn't it? I won't judge you by that avatar..
    for all I know you are 70 year old, toothless, drunken, Albanian, Tranny, out trolling the Interwebs and soaking his netherlands in a bucket of Vinegar.

    I am so on to your little scheme.

    KESHIROO
    Well that is an excellent description and you can't place a value on having a clean conscience..
    although I guess that sociopaths sleep like a rock because they don't have any concept of empathy...
    that's not helping is it?

    I said that there wasn't anything wrong with having stuff as long as it didn't consume your Life..right..I mean I'm not crazy.

    STACE
    Weird eh?
    You think man oh man, I'll show those bastards..suffer baby suffer... and than after a few years you wake up in the middle of the night and realise that they don't even know that you are stickin' it to them..D'OH!

    Compare and despair..As Stuart Smalley said, You just gotta be the best me that you can be, cause I'm good enough and smart enough, and gosh darn it, people like me.

    TARA
    Me sarcastic? Noooo.
    Please do go on...HA!

    We all need to hear it because our Culture is devolving at an embarrasing rate. It is seeping down to young children and now we are living in a world where Bratz are kicking Barbie's butt...oh how my GI Joe's appreciated Barbie's Ekbergian figure...do you realise how long it took me to find a woman with Barbie's bemused smile and her improbable 39-23-33 measurements...
    a long time time that's how long.

    What was I supposed to be talking about?

    FIRST NATIONS
    Holy Schadenfreude Batman!
    Seriously?
    You have the most interesting life..surely there is a little corner of your heart that feels...nah never mind.

    Wow that guy sounds like a textbook case..so insecure that he is willing to go to the ends of the Earth to polish the outside so that nobody can see how rotten the core is.

    I would love to know which Cult he is in..
    let me guess, Scientology,
    because it's the most expensive and you get to rub shoulders with the Stars...suhweet.

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  16. WHITESNAKE
    You're on mate! The world will be miserable once it's all peaceful and content..well it's never been like that so I guess that it is impossible to tell.

    Either way once we are at the top of the Amway chain we can do whatever the hell we want to...soon we will succumb to our own devices and hilarity ensues..then in the final scene..you'll be on top of the Empire State Building swatting Sopwith Camels out of the sky and I will be shooting up my house yelling SAY HELLO TO MY LEETLE FRIEND!

    GHOSTAY
    It's all about the dough..and Preaching is the best gig because it's Tax Free..HELLO!
    How do you beat that business model?

    Anyway I doubt that Gautami will play second fiddle so she'll be a splitter and start another chapter and then we're off to the races.
    So you better decide now if you're a Gautamist or a Donnitarian?

    MJ
    His blog totally blows chunks!
    His blog sucks hiney big time!
    His blog is so lame-o that Tom on Myspace won't even bother to be a lurker!
    His blog is so tedious that Bill Donohue of the Catholic League, who by the way IS the Catholic League, won't even denounce it let alone ban it like Kathy Griffin's blog.

    OK I'm too angry to go on..I need another libation..phew!

    Where did you see this guy anyway? Did you atleast flip him the bird?

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  17. All I know is, I am wealthy beyond all imagination with what I truly want - the warmth, love and caring from the people that are important to me. And my dog... my cat... and my horse. I know they all love me.

    I don't care who has what, because it just doesn't matter in the big scheme of things. I have a few things but nothing extravagant. I buy used vehicles. I have a tiny tv, although it is an LCD flat screen. I have enough money to live on (sometimes just barely) but I live a full life and for the most part, I am happy.

    So I don't see what else there is, really. Other than someone in my life as a partner, to share that life with and to love. Right now, that is the only thing missing... and hopefully, someday, it will be there too.

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  18. Amazing blog man! :)


    I read somewhere near the end of this post "it's another chance to make someone else happy".

    Hmm.. now I wonder where does happiness lie?!! Is it with everyone except the miserable ones? I doubt that.. and I am sure you would agree too :)

    Now one can be entertained. No one can make anyone happy. It comes with self-awareness, right? :)

    Yeah, but we can help the ones in dire need.

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  19. Damn typo!!
    I meant "No one" instead of "now one" =)

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  20. Gautamist! Donnitarian! ROTFL! now how am I going to choose between Gautami and You! both a so my BFF!

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  21. this was an excellent post and hit ever so close to home for me... my parents fall very neatly into the stuff people category,, and now with my dads heart ailments and such you would think the focus would be on downsizing,, and making life livable on the vast quantity of stuff they already have,,, but sadly no.. my mom says,, "oh no we could never live off the money we have",, of which they have plenty,, in other words,, she fully intends that the poor man go back to working after all of this to keep her in haircolor and botox... its gonna kill him,, but the flash of the material has blinded them eternally to that outcome.. it saddens me,, but i know it is out of my control....

    what an excellent post....

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  22. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  23. Yay excellent sermon, Donn!

    You're very right, the only way to deal with greedy pompous material posh twats is to ignore them. I work with a bunch of them and I do it all the time (it's fun to keep them busy talking about how expensive their cars are, how fantastic their blackberries are, and what a good time they had last weekend sailing at Côte d'Azur. The only thing is that it makes me throw up, hahaha).

    Yeah, this post made me feel real good! Nice to see that friendship, loyalty and altruism still count, at least for the pauper plebian class (of which I am a genuine representantive, haha!).

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  24. The more unequal a society, the greater the unhappiness of its citizens. Well, so says Oliver James in his Afluenza (daft name) book which I recently read. You can't really argue with it.

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  25. By now you must have developed a bloated head by all those commets aboutit being an excellent post. Dont't you worry, I am always there to downsize it for you.

    And ghosty dear, you gotta choose between me and Donn. And of course you know who to choose..:D

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  26. It's not (at least for me) about having a lot of stuff, or showing off stuff. It's about having stuff I like - I'd rather have one really great toy that costs a little more than say twenty cheap and not so great toys.

    That being said you can't judge it by what it costs but usually you pay more for quality and stylish products.

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  27. Donn I'm bailing... I'm a Gautamist. See ya in the next reincarnation.

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  28. PONYGIRL
    Your life sounds great you should be happy. Finding the right person to share it all with is the trickiest part but with a positive attitude like yours, you'll get there.

    NAHUATL
    HOLA! You are absolutely right no person or thing can make you happy that's your job...but having the right ingredients certainly helps.

    We spend most of our lives in our heads as solitary creatures but it is the interactions with others that make it interesting. Learning to respond rather than react is makes a huge difference.

    Thanks for dropping by!

    GHOSTAY
    Careful Dude...your decision may alter the space/time continuum and set the Earth on a different tangent...careful...

    PAISLEY
    Ah..those old habits die hard and once you're in a rut it can be nearly impossible to get back on track. So many men find their entire justification for living in their work and they won't let go anyway...so the botox and hair colour will prolly start flowing again.

    I just hate to see people drag themselves through 35 years at something that they hate and then drop dead 1.5 years after they retire...they postpone LIVING until the life has been drained out of them and KAPOW!

    You seem to have broken the chain and realised that Life is actually happening rfn.. this isn't a dress rehearsal we are performing as we speak.
    Enjoy the Show!

    LENI
    Pauper plebians of the world unite!
    We all have to deal with showoffs and I am always stunned when these people hit the wall or something tragic happens and most of their chums from the Clubhouse go WOAH!
    You are ruining the vibe toodaloo.

    Have ytou ever had one of them utter the drunken end-of-the-party confession that goes something like this..
    "I really envy you..I mean you seem so happy to be just getting by and your family is so nice..my kids have all this sh*t and they just want more and it's $5grand for this and $10grand for that..
    I mean look at you..you don't have all this crap.yada yada yada"

    and then you just smile and hold their head when they start barfing on your no name shoes.

    GEOFF
    I love that title...and no you cannot argue with that theory especially if the playing field is perceived to be fair...which it never really is..but take the Baby Boom when the Economy was roaring along and everyone seemed to be making headway...the society 'seemed' to operate smoother than it does now.

    Nobody can fault someone for getting ahead through hard work and determination most of us say Way To Go.

    Now CEO pay is completely f*cking out of control..they get bonuses even when the stock plummets..it is eerily mirroring the turn of the last century when the Monopoly/Oligopoly Barons ruled like Kings.

    These CEOs need to stop getting such ridiculous compensation..especially since they delegate everything
    ..bastards! I sound like a stark raving Ols School Commie HAHAHA!

    GAUTAMI
    Never. I have my ego in full check at all times..otherwise I would already be ruling the Universe, and sending the Silver Surfer out to find new worlds to plunder.

    Quit threatening my first disciple.

    CYBERPETE
    Well said. I never intended to suggest that we need crap..if you work hard for your money you deserve to buy stuff that will last and not depreciate the second that you pay for it..like cars.

    Too many people think that two is better than one and so forth and conspicuous consumption is a disease as far as I can tell.
    We all need to experience a near life episode so that we realise what we can and cannot live without...
    and I refuse to live without my family, friends, coffee, chocolate, steak, rum, or PBS.

    GHOSTAY
    WHY YOU LITTLE %#$@....
    *grabs him by the throat like Homer choking Bart

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  29. Om Gautami...Om Gautami...Thou shall not sin...Om Gautami...Thou shall give all you belongings to me to be purified...Om Gautami...Om Gautami...
    (of course all of this will be in Sanskrit...)

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  30. PSB? Pet Shop Boys?

    Well they are good, but are they up there with steak and chocolates?

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  31. preachy praps... but very true!

    i am happy. i will be happier if i win the lotto...


    mwaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa

    ReplyDelete

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