Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Platypus and the Web
I finally labeled my postings and discovered that I am a kvetching ranter who for the most part goes on and on about evolution, scientificky matters, sociopaths, myself, and blogging.
Apparently I fancy myself a bit of a writer, poet, artist, who discusses religion history, and politics.
I also natter incessantly about Rock music, bands and rewrite lyrics to pop sings.

There is tittering about SEX, Baby Boomers, movies, and documentaries on TV.
To top it all off, I liberally sprinkle statistics and maps around to embellish my fanciful notions. So I am delighted to discover that I am unique but incredibly average.

Which is fine because I believe that a Blogger is  like a Platypus.



Oh sure we are warm blooded mammals, I mean from a distance we look like busy little Beavers..
but when you get up close you think what the ____ ?

Well Platypus do have a tail like a Beaver that they use to store fat, but Bloggers make waves to warn and inform other Bloggers when danger approachs.

Platypus have webbed feet and obviously Bloggers couldn't get very far without the Web!

Like the Platypus, Bloggers are quite unique:
A duckbill for a mouth?
Hey why not, we're sort of odd ducks who communicate a little differently.

Platypus lay eggs like a chicken;
We have all laid a few that never hatched any revolutions or comments.
Oh well, you need to crack a few to make an omelette!

Platypus look cute and fuzzy but they have concealed venomous spurs (males );
Our venom can't actually kill anyone, but we can protect ourselves and stick it to unsuspecting antagonists.

Platypus use electromagnetic sensors like a shark;
Bloggers are always prowling the blogosphere zigzagging their heads to and fro looking for good vibes to zero in on.

Platypus are usually crepuscular (twilight) creatures:
Most Bloggers are also probably active at dawn (matinal) or dusk (vespertine) but thanks to the various Time Zones they seem to be nocturnal and diurnal.
I double dare you to use crepuscular in a sentence today.

Platypus produce milk but don’t have teats…umm…OK, Awkward...
Sometimes we suck, but we usually manage to squeeze the good stuff out through our pores.

Platypus are Monotremes which means they have a three in one service duct for doing their business and gettin' busy!
Oh jeez..Bloggers use their Computer to do all of their business too! No doubt a few get busy online..no, now that I think of it that sounds more like Gamers than Bloggers.
AND IN CONCLUSION...
Platypus are good swimmers but apparently they can’t stay down very long:
To be honest Bloggers stay on the surface most of the time but every so often we dive into something deep and feel our way through the darkness.

Bloggers, atleast the ones on my Blogroll, will help you back up and paddle in to shore with you to make sure that you're alright.
Besides, if we all stayed down too long we'd drive each other crazy.

So there you have it, Platypus are certainly interesting and unique.
Now it's your turn.

What other unique creatures do
Bloggers remind you of?

26 comments:

  1. sheer bucking frilliance dude! i'm a platypus and proud of it! make me a widget why dontcha!

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  2. unicorns and phoenixes

    people who have twinkles in their eyes that are the reflections of galaxies far far away

    time-travellers
    and angels

    and also, I love the everyday ordinaryness of bloggers too - normal people, normal stuff. . .

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  3. Crepuscular. Sweet!

    "Heavenly shades of night are falling, it's crepuscular time..."

    Man, that song could have been so much better.

    Oh! The question! Animals and bloggers...Well, I'm in Wisconsin so I'm gonna say Badger. I burrow into subjects, am tenacious with my subjects, and have vicious claws, all wrapped up in such a cute package!

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  4. angel,
    Platypus of the world unite!
    Our time has come and the we shall inherit the world. Despite all of the wailing and gnashing of teeth that goes on out here there is an understated sense of good old fashioned common sense available to one and all.

    Who else can solve any problem in 500 words or less?

    i like the view,
    Ooh ah mystical, yet grounded. People say that the Platypus is proof that God has a great sense of humour. This furry little evolutionary experiment took an oblique path 100 million years ago and never looked back.

    Your choices are interesting because the blogosphere is a weird mix of lala-land and the mundane.

    A horse with a narwhale horn on it's noggin would probably win the people's choice award.

    shelley,
    Badgers, we don't need no stinking Badgers! HA!

    Yes indeed many days I have been a surly little bugger all puffed up with my back to the wall bluffing my way out of an attack from a much larger adversary.

    How about a badger with a cheddar head hat! Afterall there is a lot of fromage out here too!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I was recently told that I am an emperor penguin. I like living amongst other like-minded people, I take my share of flak from the outside world, and I'm very protective of my creations. I lumber through everyday life, waiting patiently for the chance to swim gracefully in the blogosphere...

    I'm gonna shut the hell up now before I'm sick.

    Platipus are weird.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Oooh! FABOO post FO SHO! I do like me the venom part... being a hotheaded bohemian it has sure come in handy, especially in ridding myself of a bloggin basketcase who felt the need to tell me he was going to yoga naked and who felt the need to speak of his wife's vagina... I told him where to stuff it and in a post no less... ha, ha, haaaa! I later heard he told other bloggers I was a big bully! WOOH! Feels good FO SHO!

    You know, I have not been compared to unique creatures that I remember but "Lewis Black on crack" or something of the sort stands out as a faboo memory!

    As for your rants and writings, blog away amigo mio for thou art a fascinating creature all your own to bohemians everywhere, and to this one in particular, and the blogosphere is all the richer thanks to your presence! Bohemians looooove you I tell you!

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  7. The platypus is Renaissance Beast and you are the cuber equivalent of Renaissance Man. Go HE go!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Crabs.....hard on the outside, soft on the inside, tanacious, full of bluster, but DAMN, we can bite when backed into a corner!

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  9. Isn't the plural "Platypi?"

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  10. I take your dare and, if it was flowering, I could post a pic of the rose "Crepuscular." Want more? I recently had to caption a photo of an owl which is crepuscular.
    Yeah, I'm a smarty!
    Good post, Don.

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  11. *ducking*

    (but from what?)

    ReplyDelete
  12. Superb HE, for an non aussie you captured the Platypus superbly... I have had the honour of seeing them in the wild, an experience many Australians dont have... Watching it swim from a bridge for 15mins, i was only about 8... the image has stayed with me this long:)

    Beautiful to say the least....

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  13. do animals get migrain?

    ReplyDelete
  14. fathorse,
    Emperor Pengie eh? I admire those stay at home dads incubating the egg in the frozen wasteland.
    The coolest thing is to see the transition from waddling on land until they hit the water and become torpedos!
    They can'fly' in their own element.

    mizzy la boheme,
    I can just picture you dealing with that unfortunate idiot..nekked yoga is certainly not for everyone and I have found that to this day, in most social settings, discussions regarding your wife's vajeen are still thoroughly frowned upon.

    I would love to see how you catapulted him back to his cave.
    I appreciate the encouraging words.
    Gracias Senora.

    ziggi,
    You took the words right out of my mouth. I know what you're up to..a little Monty Python.
    If she is a witch, and she does weigh the same as a duck, then can we burn her?

    andrea,
    Wow! I shall, from this day forth, be known as The Gatekeeper of the Modern World. I usually think of myself as more of a ReNONSENSE Man.

    THE michael,
    and delicious! We can sidestep issues and attacks with the best of them. We're good in a 'pinch'.

    carmenzta,
    Scientists generally use 3 plural forms, platypuses, platypoda, or simply platypus.

    But you're right, it sounds like it should be the same as hippopotamus, which are known as hippopotamuses and hippopotami.

    dinahmow,
    I should have known better. Bravo!! It doesn't really roll off the tip of your tongue like some other 13 cent words but damn if it don't sound all latiny and such.
    (laughs like goofy)

    i like the view,
    Hopefully ziggi will be back to 'splain herself. That IS what you're thinking about, isn't it?

    aidan,
    That would be really cool to actually see one. Thank goodness I didn't try to drag in all of the continental/marsupial/monotreme stuff with Australia and South America and how Beavers can get up to 50 pounds...too scientificky.

    The non Aussie thingamabob is a HUGE compliment.. I could probably be wildlife tour guide over there because I've been completely gaga over your fauna for atleast four decades!

    ghosty,
    Yes they do get migraines, especially when they mi-grate. They have to pack up and leave, fight the traffic, watch out for hunters, and there is always the weather..migrating is no walk in the park it is stressful! I'd be a wreck.

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  15. A bukin frilliant post HE! I learnt that from u btw :)

    **Bloggers are always prowling the blogosphere zigzagging their heads to and fro looking for good vibes to zero in on.

    I agree. We r like fast lil creatures swimming in the big ocean looking for good vibes all the time.

    Neat post...very smart thinking.


    **What other unique creatures do
    Bloggers remind you of?


    Mermaids...they r unique, mysterious, unseen yet seen n heard all the time in the ocean of Blogville.


    Keshi.

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  16. Can I skite? (That's Aus-talk for boast)
    At my previous home I saw a platypus on the bank of our creek.What the__!This thing should have been IN the creek.It seemed unhurt so I called a ranger who said it was almost certainly a young male, leaving home to make his own way.Because of heavy rains, all the creeks were running high and he just took a short cut.I just stood in the pee-ing rain watching for ages.

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  17. keshiroo,
    Mermaids, Sirens...how Silors ever thought that Manatees or Dugongs were beautiful women is a damning testament to how strong their daily allotment of Rum must have been.

    dinahmow,
    Poor little guy. That would be awesome. Even their legs are still in that transitional reptilian out at the sides stage. They are an evolutionary trainwreck but the end result is beyond the realm of science fiction writers.
    Poor little guy awww!

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  18. Ok smarty pants I wanna here abot a Bilby

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  19. steve,
    Who could forget Bill Bixby? The star of TV Classics like My Favorite Martian, The Courtship of Eddy's Father, and The Incredible Hulk!
    "Don't make me angry.
    You wouldn't like me when I'm angry!"

    Oh a BILBY! My bad.

    You mean the voracious little nocturnal omnivorous marsupial with the backward pouch which evolved so that they don't get dirt in it when they are burrowing? All I know is that Australians are trying to replace the Easter Bunny with the Bilby and I saw proof of it on Cazzie's blog.

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  20. Taking it to the monotreme! Excellent!

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  21. allan,
    HA!
    Mono is the loneliest number that you'll ever do. It brings new meaning to the phrase I got a hole in one.

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  22. gautami,
    Aww shucks! You are much too kind.

    ReplyDelete
  23. BreadedSquarefish5:16 PM

    Platypii, eh? See here, my good man: Dugongs are purtortedly
    far more... shall we say, socially
    accessible? Why not elaborate on the many happinesses of hasty, Dugong-Man alliances, or the like? Haven't platypusses got enough on their plates? Clearly, they could use both privacy and time (say, 150M years or so) to sort things out among themselves. Bosch and Breughel might argue... screw 'em!

    My eyes well up, when I think of that Start Wrek opening monologue,
    ".. boldly going, where no Manatee
    ought to have gone, before...",
    followed posthaste by a Motel 6 ad.
    Wrong, wrong, at so many levels!

    ReplyDelete

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