Friday, February 17, 2006


Persistent rumors that the Prime Minister had a charisma bypass at a private clinic in Alberta should be laid to rest.
Mr. Harper is an economist.

Most people realise that economists are 'poindexters' who simply lack the pizzazz to become one of those 'zany' chartered accountants.
The image of a calm, emotionally unavailable and highly sedated guy in a grey suit is the perfect image for the Prime Minister of Canada.

While the rest of the world is gearing up for World War 3, Canadians can sit back and watch our rag tag team of millionaire NHLers humiliate the competition at the Olympics. Perceived around the world as level headed 'weinies' Canadians have a Jeckyl & Hyde character flaw that is exposed in the presence of a puck. It is the 'Achilles Heel' of our society.

Canadians are uniquely resolute in their defense of condoning assault and battery as an intricate and essential element of the game despite the fact that fighting is prohibited in all other major league sports,oh, except for boxing, DUH!
If only that Al Kayda guy played hockey, we'd beat the crap out of him.
You wanna go Al?!

Within the confines of cold, doughnut strewn arenas, young boys and girls are released from their obligations of civility and self control. Hidden from the prying eyes of her neighbours 'Hockey Moms' pardon their offspring from the pressures of being 'nice'.

"Don't take that sh*t from that kid!..TIMMY! you wanna walk home?...TIMMY! shift you get out there and kill that little son of a....HEY REF... open your f***ing eyes out there!!"

We are, after all is said and done, a nation of passive/aggressive people.

If the Americans are the flambouyant and outlandish accountants then we Canadians are the reserved and much more dignified economists. If the Americans do something that alarms us... well...let's see, maybe we will ignore them for a couple of days...pretend that we're not home when they phone...OUCH! Or..get this... maybe we'll play with our European friends this weekend. OH YEAH! OH YEAH!

Tonight Canadians can rejoice in their good fortune as the guy in the grey pajamas at 24 Sussex tucks his kids into bed with a heartfelt handshake. Gone are the days of 'smarty pants' intellectuals with fancy sideburns pirouetting behind the Queen and driving around Ottawa in sporty convertibles with 'la-de-da' movie stars.

Yessiree we have hit the jackpot this time.
George Bernard Shaw once said, "If all economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion." Hey man that's our Prime Minister that you're 'dissin. You just watch him go. The rest of the world loves us ! C'mon Shaw you want some of this?! C'mon George...Drop the gloves..Let's Go..Right here..

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