Friday, September 23, 2011

Rattling The Swill Bucket

"Advertising is the rattling of a stick inside a swill bucket"
George Orwell

We male homo escapeons might try to distance ourselves from the primordial impulses which control our wenis and influence 99.99% of our behaviour...but we can't....not really.

Like it or not Ladies, we men can blame the brain. Yes our ridiculous sex drive is mercilessly dictated by the three-pound lump of jello lodged between our ears. The thick skull houses the 200,000 year-old monkey-brain which helped our species escape a period of drastic climate change that ravaged our once edenic& verdant bithplace, the African Savannah.

Fast forward to the present day age of incomprehensible miracles such as the world wide interwebs, mapping the human genome, and Hollywood suits green-lighting re-makes of 70s & 80s movies that nobody really liked the first time around...
and here we are..

still slaves to our apeman cravings.

I present as evidence of our anthro-psychological mindcuffs exhibit A: a simple car commercial.
Perhaps you've seen it?
How I love the catchy song 
Tightrope by Janelle Monae
you can listen to her video for the song here>

and now here is the car commercial >!

Listen to all the benefits of owning this vehicle...
interspersed with the now ubiquitous jumpcut imaging of young people on the cusp of having it all. WOW!
But wait?

There is one shot 40 seconds in that every wenis owner from 12 to 90 remembers..
it's only on for a single second...

and it has nothing to do with driving the car.

It's this cute girl in repose enjoying a carefree moment at the beach..

Actually most guys don't even notice that there is a Dude sitting behind her?
I didn't.

Now we all know that male humans crave a mindnumbingly low standard of needs, wants and desires... and therefore sex sells. 
I suppose that as a former TV spot writer/producer I may scrutinize Ads a smidge more than most folks, but most of the comments about this spot are asking about that girl. 

Perhaps the male sex drive is the achilles' is regularly used to destroy Kings, capture Spies and snag the tall good-looking guy down the street with the great job that's married to what's-her-face?.

We "Y" chromers and our seemingly endless supply of fertilizer..enough to effortlessly impregnate bajillions of females and re-populate our own planets...we're all virtually powerless to deflect either subliminal or blatant sexual messages.

It's not fair...ladies you should point fingers at the evil advertising wizards who are manipulating  our evolutionary monkey-see, monkey want-to-do brain!

This might be the greatest car in the world, but 99% of the hetero men will remember this one second flash of this cute girl in the Ad, and maybe even the name of the vehicle.

If Advertising is the rattling of a stick inside a swill bucket, this Orwellian pronouncement works on so many levels.
Rattling the stick indeed!


  1. Wow. Good eye. I get your point. I mean ...

  2. funny.... I only noticed the guy wearing leathers...

  3. I only noticed the gearshift.

  4. Anonymous11:21 a.m.

    hey you're missing from fb.
    not that i like that place. have never connected with fb much.

  5. Most of the time there isn't even anything in the bucket

  6. Arse. Who do you think you are, Darwin? You're here. I thought you were still a Farcebook weenie.

  7. I love tits. But I remembered (at the end of the clip) the face of the lady, close to the end, she had black hair. Oh, and the cow, looking athe car, probably farting.

    Nice to see you blogging again, Zuckerl ...

  8. rustle the grass to startle the snakes.....

  9. Wishing you the best Christmas ever.

  10. -----((*))--

    Feliz Navidad, Donn and family!

    I hope that you're all warm, safe, cozy, and free from man eating polar bears this time of year.

    Best wishes and cheers for the holiday season. May the new year surround you joyfully with friends, family, and fun!!!


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