homo escapeons

2012-02-10T15:09:00.002-06:00

HAPPY EVOLUTION WEEKEND!

I am Agnostic because I accept that the BIGGEST question of this ongoing debate cannot be definitively won or lost based upon our current level of available scientific data.

To many folks this is perceived as fence-sitting. This is how the incomparable Carl Sagan explained his position: "An agnostic is somebody who doesn't believe in something until there is evidence for it, so I'm agnostic. I have some discomfort with both believers and with nonbelievers when their opinions are NOT based on facts ... If we don't know the answer, why are we under so much pressure to make up our minds, to declare our allegiance to one hypothesis or the other?"

I have friends who are anchored along every angstrom of the debate scale. Oh sure sometimes I totally lose it with the Fundies, but I acknowledge that the vast majority of people wish to incorporate both aspects into their lives. So instead of letting the extremists on either end continue to monopolize this discussion, Evolution Weekend looks like a viable alternative that most of us can build upon..without compromising on Evolution because I oppose the ongoing movement to incorporate "Intelligent Design" into the education system.

"Evolution Weekend is a chance to celebrate the intersection of religion and science and to do so in a mature manner. The clergy members of The Clergy Letter Project are deeply religious, every bit as devout as the fundamentalists who oppose them, but they also recognize that practicing their religion should not have to mean turning their backs on the facts of science.

Instead, they understand that a deeper understanding of the natural world will only enhance their faith. And they are not so insecure in their faith that they feel compelled to condemn all other belief as false and demand that everyone else be forced to accept their singular perspective."

Evolution Weekend is an opportunity for religious individuals to practice their faith while appreciating all science has taught us.

Evolution Weekend: Protecting Both Religion and Science

www.huffingtonpost.com

Live!

2012-01-13T14:31:00.002-06:00

the original...love it...

but I feel a need for meme...

Feel free to drop a few tag lines for me to work with.

Merry Crizzmess

2011-12-25T11:38:00.000-06:00

I plan to beat the Duggars next year and have my own show

On behalf of "my self" which was formed by happenstancial random events in the "meatworld" and my genetic disposition donated by my family DNA, not to mention all of the other entities cluttering my mind, I would like to wish all of YOU an awesome New 365 1/4 days.

I wish that I could manage to spend time here and on F%#@book, but I can't seem to pull that off...even though I only sleep aboot 5 hours a night? I do miss the intimacy of being with the "in-crowd"...it fgelt like we were pioneers in our own private world ...which was paradoxically open to the entire world wide internet(s)?

I still feel like I said the same thing over and over for 5 years but it was the people like you who made the experience rewarding. Thank You.

Rattling The Swill Bucket

2011-09-23T13:47:00.004-05:00

"Advertising is the rattling of a stick inside a swill bucket"
George Orwell

We male homo escapeons might try to distance ourselves from the primordial impulses which control our wenis and influence 99.99% of our behaviour...but we can't....not really.

Like it or not Ladies, we men can blame the brain. Yes our ridiculous sex drive is mercilessly dictated by the three-pound lump of jello lodged between our ears. The thick skull houses the 200,000 year-old monkey-brain which helped our species escape a period of drastic climate change that ravaged our once edenic& verdant bithplace, the African Savannah.

Fast forward to the present day age of incomprehensible miracles such as the world wide interwebs, mapping the human genome, and Hollywood suits green-lighting re-makes of 70s & 80s movies that nobody really liked the first time around...
and here we are..
still slaves to our apeman cravings.

I present as evidence of our anthro-psychological mindcuffs exhibit A: a simple car commercial.
Perhaps you've seen it?
How I love the catchy song Tightrope by Janelle Monae
you can listen to her video for the song here>
*
Mm-mm-MM!

and now here is the car commercial >!

Listen to all the benefits of owning this vehicle...
interspersed with the now ubiquitous jumpcut imaging of young people on the cusp of having it all. WOW!
But wait?

There is one shot 40 seconds in that every wenis owner from 12 to 90 remembers..
BAM...
it's only on for a single second...
and it has nothing to do with driving the car.

It's this cute girl in repose enjoying a carefree moment at the beach..

Actually most guys don't even notice that there is a Dude sitting behind her?
I didn't.

Now we all know that male humans crave a mindnumbingly low standard of needs, wants and desires... and therefore sex sells.
I suppose that as a former TV spot writer/producer I may scrutinize Ads a smidge more than most folks, but most of the comments about this spot are asking about that girl.

Perhaps the male sex drive is the achilles' heel..it is regularly used to destroy Kings, capture Spies and snag the tall good-looking guy down the street with the great job that's married to what's-her-face?.

We "Y" chromers and our seemingly endless supply of fertilizer..enough to effortlessly impregnate bajillions of females and re-populate our own planets...we're all virtually powerless to deflect either subliminal or blatant sexual messages.

It's not fair...ladies you should point fingers at the evil advertising wizards who are manipulating our evolutionary monkey-see, monkey want-to-do brain!

This might be the greatest car in the world, but 99% of the hetero men will remember this one second flash of this cute girl in the Ad, and maybe even the name of the vehicle.

If Advertising is the rattling of a stick inside a swill bucket, this Orwellian pronouncement works on so many levels.
Rattling the stick indeed!

Midlife... it's all about the what "if" ?

2011-08-18T06:29:00.002-05:00

Yesterday at the Beach I saw the question mark cloud (helped it out a little ;) and spooked the Gulls to get them to go up right in front of me.

Mad-Bad-Sad-Fad-Rad-Advertising

2011-05-27T10:40:00.002-05:00

Six years ago Blogging was a wonderful zenlike experience because most bloggers didn't really care about Advertising.

It would have been sort of tacky..although every blogger may have secretly dreamed that international succe$$ was inevitable as soon as everyone finally realized that their blog was a consistently mindboggling, heartbreaking work of staggering genius ..no biggie. :)

check out more of these astute cynical images at Things Real People Don't Say About Advertising http://tpdsaa.tumblr.com/

Today North Americans are exposed to hundreds of brands via dozens of formats that deliver 3,500 Ads per day. We finally get PVRs so that we can skip all the TV commercials, and now the world wide interwebs is infected.

Why should we be forced to sit through an Ad to watch a video on YouTube... Thanks Google!

Nowadays you can't even just close some pop-up ads, "let the cursor hover over the red "Close" button before clicking: if it looks like a hand instead of an arrow, don't click it -- close the whole tab to get rid of it" http://www.media-awareness.ca/blog/index.cfm?CommentID=176

The marketing mayhem is much worse much worse than the golden age of advertsing back in the MAD MEN 50s. Now all the major film studios, TV networks, radio and television stations, cable channels, Internet, book and magazine publishing and music companies are owned by a few conglomerates.

That's why you notice these massive cross-promotional campaigns that create these illusions of ubiquity....product placement in your skull from meal toys at McDonalds to banner ads to newspaper flyers to bookstore coffee mugs to billboards.

I studied marketing in college and produced TV ads so perhaps I'm hypersensitive to the ADvalanche of stealth & ambient, product placement, data mining ..it's destroying the once pleasurable experience surfing of the Internet.

All of the online Op-Ed Aggregator (HuffPo) and Lamestream Media News outlets are now riddled with piggybacked marketing messages from one of the conglomerates that totally "owns" them...in every sense of the word. Watch this disaster after you see this ad for cat food. It's a sinister global competition for your eyeballs>brain> wallet/purse.

There is a shark frenzy happening in your clickstream so don't fall in.

COME ON CANADA

2011-05-03T09:46:00.001-05:00

http://www.fairvote.ca/en/Canadians-cheated-again-by-voting-system

2011-02-27T10:42:00.001-06:00

Humans are odd little creatures.
We're Causal Determinists cursed with Cognitive Dissonance and Inequity Aversion.

In the West we sit back and grumble as the Governments bail out the Billionaires & Banks that gambled and lost billion$ of our money.

We don't live in the nice little comfortable Middle Class world of the 50s. Advertisers want us to think we do but in reality we live under the same system that has existed since day one. If you need proof, here it is...MotherJones

It has been amazing to watch the young people in the Middle East risk their lives to escape the tyranny of the elite.

I wondered what would happen if North Americans decided that the system needs replacing and march en masse? Until people are starving I don't think that we'd challenge the system. We have too much stuff to lose and we don't want to get clubbed or shot at with rubber bullets. We'll just wait and vote for the opposition, then things will change! We'll show them!

"Many of us have superstitions – odd, reassuring habits that make no rational sense – but there may be an underlying reason for such behaviour.

Our brains are designed to detect structure and order in our environment, says Bruce Hood at the University of Bristol, UK. We are also causal determinists - we assume that outcomes are caused by preceding events.

This combination of sensing patterns and inferring causes leaves us wide open to superstitious beliefs. "But there are very good reasons why we have evolved these capabilities," Hood adds. Spotting and responding to some uncertain cause-and-effect relationships can be crucial for survival."

Ten Things We Don't Know About Humans

It almost seems as though we've just started to wake up from Millenia of bullshit? I like to think that the Interwebz had something to do with that. People can only respond to situations when they have information.?

Winterkills

2011-02-07T08:36:00.002-06:00

I shouldn't read stuff like

" Why The Future doesn't need us :( "

during the Winter months.

It argues that human beings would likely guarantee their own extinction. Like Winter isn't bad enough?

Whinging and kvetching aboot it feels good.

Donnsizing

2011-01-21T09:50:00.002-06:00

I think that I'm ready to do some serious eviscerating on my stagnating blog. I just don't have the heart to delete it.

I'll go back through the archives and keep a couple postings per month...but only if they somehow connected with my inner narrative or a few readers.

I need to be pro-active and clean up my clickstream in case I decide to run for public office in the meatworld.

No really? Could happen?

Most of us say/write things which might be misinterpreted by others and might interrupt the momentum of our mid-life crisis of consciousness crusade.
Hahahaha.

I can hear you laughing but it could happen?

Does your archive contain any time bombs which might blow up in your face? What exactly is the point of keeping all of that dynamite in your basement?

Is Reconstructionism a real threat?

2011-01-13T09:59:00.006-06:00

Last night I watched Obabma's very moving National address in Tucson and I could not help but notice that there really is no discernible separation of church and state in the USA.

Is is just me or did every second sentence seem to be a scripture or reference to the Christian version of GOD?
There is no doubt aboot who the official deity of America is.

Which is why Michelle Bachmann and her Reconstructionist supporters, who believe that Jesus Christ will not return to earth until Christians have taken over the government, seem far more viable and dangerous than Palin. No really?

Anyway, Sarah's latest gaff has prolly sidelined her Presidential aspirations. My guess is that Palin prolly had no idea that blood libel referred to an ancient anti-semitic claim that the Jews used the blood of Christian babies to make matzoh.

I imagine that she'll "refudiate" it.
My guess is that Sarah's over-extended Warholian 15 minutes of hopey famey stuff are now up.

What scares me most, is that Palin was a walk in the park compared to the serious-as-a-heart-attack Dominionists who want a Christian Government that would among other things ruthlessly administer the 600ish inflexible Mosaic laws upon society with extreme prejudice.

There would be thousands of public stoning excutions of gays, women who have abortions, and people who hit their parents!

Can you imagine having an Old-Timey-Testament White House administering 600 archaic inflexible laws upon society?

Of course that could never happen, right?

GUILTY OF BLOG ABANDONMENT

2011-01-09T09:22:00.004-06:00

I wanted to write about the latest shooting spree in Tucson Arizona. Then I remembered that I wrote about gun violence in April 2007 after another incident. I wanted to remind myself of the huge difference between our countries...a lot of which is the result of America's incomprehensible Gun addiction.

There are 2.3 million American and 225,000 Canadian deaths every year. Of those 30,000 Americans commit suicide every year (80/day) compared to 4,000 Canadians (10/day), again quite similar. BUT, in the USA there are 14,000 Murders per Year (38/day) 10,000 of which (27/day) are the result of GUNS. Canada has about 175 Gun/Murders per year (1 every 2nd day).

So once again, I've discussed this issue. Which is why I am truly humbled by anyone who can still manage to find the time and effort to blog, especially if they are on Facebook!?

If one were to liken the Interwebz to oh, um, let's say a "Ladies Prison Film", just for instance.

Then I'm just your run-of-the-mill, opportunistic, night-shift guard who exhibits very poor impulse control when faced with any ethical dilemma.

Miss Blog is a wholesome, wrongly-accused, sews-her-own-clothes, nice, smart, cornfed gal (with a few issues) from 'Mensa' Arizonee.

However whistling at me from the next cell, smothered in baby oil, is a buck-nekked, jaw-droppin' Miz Facebook who is a nymphomaniacal, G-note/night pro from Lost Wages, Nevada who wants to give you that once-in-a-lifetime-toe-curling-kama-sutric experience every night.

I am not made of steel.

Okay seriously, it's not that great, it's just the path of least resistance thingamabob. The spirit is 'chillin' and the flesh is weak.

Winter In Whateverpeg

2010-11-25T14:20:00.007-06:00

Good Day eh!

I'm too cold, tired, and lazy to describe how mindnumbingly tedious Winter can be here in the Colonies.

That being said, it occurred to me that NASA could recruit anyone from my neighbourhood to be an Astronaut.

We all know how to endure months of isolation, cold, and darkness.

You either learn how to make yer own fun, or risk spiralling into a "blahcoma"...

just don't hide your blahcoma medication after you've taken it..
not cool.

You can try cross-country skiing..

skidoodling...

trapping...

bear sledding...

or why not build a snow fort?

pretty cool eh?

The worst kept secret to surviving a Canadian Winter, is that most of us bugger off to MEXICO!

The best part of a Canadian winter is having a Cuban cigar and a Jamaican rum on a Mexican vacation!

REGAL DNA BEYOND REPAIR

2010-11-18T01:05:00.003-06:00

DATELINE LONDON:

Following the recent trothing of Prince Willy Wales and Katty Kay, genetic scientists immediately sprang into action.

Newfound evidence of a once secret program which carefully monitors the breeding of aristocratic European families recently came to light.

Yesterday, around noon, several files were discovered by scavenging Government workers searching for food in the garbage bins behind the Freedom Of Information Bunker.

Members of Royalty are not bred for a specific skill or purpose other than to be entered into an ancient 'show' between Nations. Awards are generally based on conspicuous displays of wealth, but sometimes given to outgoing characters who have displayed outstanding, energetic acts of immorality.

From the files we learn that during the Middle Ages it became apparent that without fail, royal families produced offspring burdened with many undesirable attributes.

These traits ranged from simple undesirable character irregularities such as uncontrollable giggling, to despotic paranoia and delusions of grandeur.

One doctor, Lord Sinjin Tennisanyone, correctly deduced that this appalling condition was the direct result of over 800 years of unbridled inbreeding amongst the European Aristocracy.

In order to combat these terrible afflictions and maintain political stability, substitute eggmaidens were selected from asylums.

This selective breeding program was astonishingly successful and lasted well into the 20th Century.

However, once the Human Genome had been mapped, the Tennisanyone family, gatekeepers of the Royal basting and neutering program, introduced modern scientificky procedures in order to streamline the process and free-up their weekends.

These days all that is required to successfully create an aristocrat is a wee DNA sample from suitable donors most of which are still conveniently warehoused in asylums.

A procedure that once required numerous bottles of Gin, scented candles, yards of velvet rope, and a tub of lard, can now be done in a matter of minutes.

The only constant still required is that the Princess or Queen must be either rendered unconscious or distracted with jewelry or shoes.

Here for the first time we can view the shocking photographic evidence of what could happen if scientists refused to intervene.

Exhibit A is unquestionably shocking. This is a computer generated image of what William and Harry would have looked like, had Charles been allowed to follow his own devices.

Exhibit B is another disturbing projection of the future progeny which Princes William and Harry would unleash if their severely compromised royal swimmers, floaters, twirlers and sinkers were allowed near an egg.

As you can see, this remains a highly sensitive issue, and you didn't hear this from me, but a Mrs. Gwynyth Throatwarbler Sharpley of Thamesmead, is suspected of being harvested on four separate occasions.

So Mums the word eh?

DOES DEATH SCARE THE LIFE OUT OF YOU?

2010-11-02T11:23:00.010-05:00

Most of us are all too familiar with the Kübler-Rossian 5 F'n stages of dealing with Death, terminal illness, catastrophic personal loss, significant life events, and any other tragedy or disaster.

1) NO F*CKING WAY?
denial
"This can't be happening not to me Nuh-UH?
Talk to the hand."

2) F*CKKKKKK!
anger
"Son-of-a! Oh no YOU di'int!?"

3) HOLY F*CK!!!
bargaining
"I'd make a deal with God,
And I'd get him to swap our places"
Kate Bush Running Up That Hill

4 f*ck it :(
depression
"Think I'll just go and eat worms.
And when I'm gone you wait and see,
They'll all be sorry oh so sorry that they picked on me."

5) Ahhh f*ck
acceptance
"Yeah but what-are-ya-gonna-do?"
Homer J Simpson

What brought this on?
Last weekend I went to see BODIES the Exhibition and yes it did affect me.

The platicized people made me realise that we are, to quote The Fifth Element, meat popsicles. When sliced up and laid out on a table, we look like a platter of Ham, Turkey, Steaks and Ribs. I'll never carve a Christmas Dinner again without noticing how similar we are.

Which is fine. As an empiricist I accept the scientificky theory that it took 3 Billion Years of evolutionary tinkering to create us. From stiffly finned fish through to primates...

it makes perfect sense that our basic template has been modified to accomodate our progress.

We've come a long way from the primordial ooze to our own unique place in the grand scheme of things. No other creature can boast of having attained such a dysfunctional and near complete separation from the Natural World.

But it dawned on me that all of those other organs are just there to support the 3 pound glob of jello folded betwixt our ears. I don't know how electric-chemical connectors create a mind out of a brain, and I also understand, that I never will.

That being said, I honestly believe that we ARE our mind.

When I looked at the bodies in the exhibit I was fine, but once I glanced into the faces and saw those marble eyes in a real face, it freaked me out. Then I would suddenly be aware that at one point in time, this WAS A REAL PERSON.

A human being who experienced all of the same emotional trials and (hopefully) a few triumphs as the rest of us, and who no doubt wondered what would happen to "them" after they died...
especially ending up on display like this?

When my time comes, I hope that it's sudden, and that somehow Monica Bellucci was directly responsible.

Just kidding, no seriously, I can only dream of dying in my sleep like Grandpa, and not like the terrified screaming passengers in his car...
okay sorry, I love that old joke.

For the time being I'm not going to obssess aboot it. All the whatifs and shoulda-woulda-coulda's add up fast and take the fun out of being a cognizant being. Like these future Darwin Award recipients.

NOW is a gift, that's why they call it The Present.
..go ahead and groan.

Personally, I don't see any point in trying to figure oot what's waiting on the other side, if anything, because nobody knows, and there is no way of finding out.

There have been plenty of theories dreamed up over the past several Millenia. Some of them are creative & comforting, the recycling ones are nice, but for the most part, most of these imaginings are just plucked out of thin air and burdened with laugh-oot-loud, perplexing, guilt-ridden, value-added rules which nobody can adhere to anyway?

I just hope that researchers keep pluggin' away on how a physical brain creates a magical mind so that eventually Humans can stop worrying aboot it.

For now I'll just keep renewing my Lease On Life with the Reaper every Halloween. I guess that if I am being perfectly honest with myself, I'm stuck in the "bargaining" phase.

Aren't we all?

And the winner is...

2010-10-30T23:59:00.009-05:00

Congratulations link here> BEAST

Winner of the Fall 2010

Freakin Green Elf Shorts !

The Beast certainly "upped the stakes on the compo entries".

May he Lord them over one and all with pomp and circumstance. Amen.

If Old Knudsen were King

and Miss Mj were Queen!

MAY THE Freakin Green Elf SHORTS BE WITH YOU!

UPDATE: Freakin Green Elf Shorts Caption Competition

2010-10-25T23:25:00.005-05:00

IT IS ON!

The general idea of the 'Freakin’ Green Elf Shorts' Caption Competition is to post a photo of yourself on your blog, wearing "The Shorts".

Whoever comes up with the best caption wins "The Shorts".

The current holder of "The Shorts" then sends the winner "The Shorts" and a few souvenirs from their country.

So here we go, caption this...

The winner to be announced @ Midnight, on Saturday, October 30th.

This is actually my #700th post and I am thrilled that it will be bouncing around the intertubes forever proclaiming the winner of the Freakin Green Elf Shorts (Fall 2010).

I could use a little help here and so far the captions that have resonated avec moi and my secret panel are:

"Freak it to Beaver"
(Kapitano)

"While wearing Green Elf Shorts patients may experience, Swelling of the mouth, face, lips, or tongue, sexual hallucinations, uncontrolled sexual desires, change in sexual orientation, spontaneous sequential hermaphroditism, an erection lasting more than 4 hours, absence of orgasm, erectile dysfunction, inability to attain an erection, decreased libido, absence of ejaculation, decreased estrogen, testosterone production, enlarged prostate, enlarged labia, impotence, frigidity, lack of sexual excitement, aversion of sexual contact, painful intercourse, involuntary spasm of vaginal wall muscles, vaginal dryness, inability to feel aroused, sexual trauma, vulvodynia, vulvar vestibulitis, inability to relax vaginal muscles, burning pain on the vulva or in the vagina, sexual trauma, and sudden sexual death.
Remove Green Elf Shorts and call your doctor if you suffer any of these persistent adverse reactions."(ayeM8y)

"Everyone fled through the Canadian woodland when Celine Dion started singing..."
(Scarlet Blue)

"A Nightmare on Elf Street"
(S.I.D.)

"Something about that DIY-destillery was quiet wrong."
(63mago)

"Armed only with a bootleg edition of Photoshop, Coppens takes aim (downwards and slightly to the left) at the record for sheer mass of Jungian archetype-images utilized in one frame."
(First Nations)

"Is that a fish in your hand or are you just happy to see me? "
(Boxer)"

".....and that children, is why Uncle Donn is not allowed to visit anymore."
(S.I.D.)

"A tame piece of fish is always preferable to a wild beaver with teeth."
(Damien Oz)

"and don't it make my green shorts blue"
(Scarlet Blue)

"and then suddenly, kewpie realized where he was".
(designing wally)

"A nice big beaver and the smell of fish - that usually means 'good times'!"
(tom909)

"Donn (with 2 n's) bravely tries to save his country's national fish from the ravages of Al Qaida's WMCD (Weapon of Mass Canadian Destruction), but is tripped up by a traitorous home-grown terrorist."
(Rimpy)

"Donn should have known better than to ask the wild beaver for a threesome. It recruited the Taliban to make sure he never came back in the woods."
(Roses)

"Joseph and Mary watched in amazement as the 'real' last supper took place right before their innocent Canadian eyes."
(Awaiting)

"Flashback 1982;
Donn the dwarf auditions for The Safety Dance"
(hayward)

"Once again, Donn has indulged in cold pizza and pickles before bedtime.At least this time there were no skunks in his nightmare."
(LDahl)

(BEAST)

Feel free to express your righteous indignation and throw a hissy-fit, vote for one of these, channel your inner altruist to champion another competitor, or better yet, stop beeyotchin' and add a new one...there is still plenty of time before Midnight Saturday Oct 30th.

That being said, the clock is ticking and somebody is going to have the FGES and some cool crap from Whateverpeg; (Canada's hotbed of iniquity, romance & intrigue) by Christmas!!

So let's get down to bi'ness!
WHAT SAY YOU!?

Whateverpeg ZOMBIE Walk 2010

2010-10-23T23:43:00.006-05:00

There was a chill in the air and a full moon in the sky when suddenly I was attacked by a ZOMBIE!

From out of nowhere it yoinked me from my vehicle.
Luckily I was rescued by two survivors.

The survivors brought me to a location in the Exchange District where thousands of Zombies had gathered.

Their leader mumbled an impassioned speech about the lack of Zombie rights...

and whipped the crowd into a frenzy.

The Zombies easily overpowered the single Zombie Disposal Unit which has also fallen victim to cutbacks from City Hall.

Now there was nothing to stop them from terrorizing the city in search of braaains and so off they shuffled into the night.

Despite the best efforts of my two bodyguards,

I fear that I am doomed..

blech!!

I only hope that I can hang on long enough...
to announce winner of the Freakin Green Elf Shorts caption contest...
next Saturday... October 30.... at midnight!

FREAKIN GREEN ELF SHORTS 2010

2010-10-10T01:36:00.007-05:00

Ladies and Gentlemen, it is with great pleasure that I announce the arrival of the Freakin Green Elf Shorts.

The friendly FREAKIN GREEN ELF SHORTS competition began way back in 2004 in Ohio, and since it's ominous inception, the actual shorts have been shuttled off to exotic places like New Zealand, Ireland, Salt Lake City, Switzerland, Toronto, Denmark, Texas, and several stays throughout jolly olde England.

Now I shall prepare my own visual image, which shall then be mercilessly assailed with rude, hilarious, yet strangely insightful remarks, with mischief aforethought, by cybervolk from all walks of life, both foreign, domestic, and from parts unknown. Hilarity and mayhem shall ensue.

Click HERE for a concise historical outline of the event prepared by the incomparable MJ of Infomaniac fame, who just so happened to have won the event in 2007.

I was fortunate enough to win the photo-quip competition back in 2009, and for those of you who know what the hell I am talking aboot, Cyberpete filled the box with loads of treats from Denmark.

I am the fourth proud Canadian to have captured the prize..
a moment please, I'm a little verklempt...
and I look upon this honour with humility, shock, and awe.

This truly is a global event, and though it is not suitable for children, the faint of heart, weak of mind, or uptight ninnys, I encourage you to tell all of your friends about it, unless of course they're way funnier than you are. HELLO!?

I look forward to some exciting wordplay, foreplay, and fairplay. Prepare to witness a vigorous display of intellectual vigor and Wildian wit rarely seen on the electronic Interwebs.

Please plan on participating and making this the best event ever.

In closing, may I present for your viewing pleasure, a gallery of some of the characters who have lived the dream.

You get the idea.

Okay, give me a few days to catch my breath from all the excitement, properly self medicate, get my affairs in order, and then let the asshattery begin!

2010-10-08T15:23:00.001-05:00

Imagine there's no Lennon?

I put this drawing together shortly after the senseless slaying of John on December 8, 1980. What I failed to see in the heat of the moment was that it was not "the day the music died".

A part of me wanted, and still wants, to play judge, jury, and executioner and exact some instant karma on his psychotic assassin, but I have a feeling that John would disapprove.

A large part of what allows his music to stand the test of time, is his recurring message of Peace.

'Imagine' has long been my Agnostic anthem.

No hell below us, above us only sky, and no religion too.

However John also mentioned other obstacles, no countries, possessions, nothing to kill or die for, no need for greed or hunger.

This fantastic idealism all makes perfect sense to me and millions of others, despite the fact that there always seems to be just enough humans, who are so full of ignorance and hate, who keep us circling the drain.

Maybe that's why the song is so bittersweet, because it's totally impossible...

and yet, so many of us still want to believe in it.

They may say that he was dreamer, but he's not the only one.

2010-10-03T23:24:00.002-05:00

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month

I thought I'd post this video of Paul McCartney rehearsing 'Maybe I'm Amazed', it was a tribute to his wife Linda.

Linda was diagnosed with breast cancer in 1995, and died at the age of 56 in 1998. Lady McCartney would have turned 69 last month!

I couldn't help but notice how Paul's face lights up when he turns to her.

2010-09-29T11:53:00.007-05:00

Chillin with Psilocybin

For the past three days I have been imprisoned in my home nursing a wrenched lower %$#@ back.

All together now, "you poor little bunny".

This morning I may have overmedicated.

Ask your Pharmacist if Magic Mushrooms are right for you?..

and hey kids, Score Goals NOT drugs!

2010-09-29T01:11:00.003-05:00

TWO PATHS!?

I always wondered aboot a particular line in Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven, a sprinkling from the May Queen? Apparently it's "spring clean"!

DOH!

"Two Paths On The Wrong Track" was taken at dusk in Woodridge, Manitoba

Some dude on Yahoonswers wrote:

"Plant was deeply into Lord of the Rings at this time, so the May Queen was probably Galadriel, like the lines "all that glittered around her was gold", Lothlorien having golden leaves.
Frodo and his bunch reached there in spring, and were on a mission to "clean out" the world of Sauron."

2010-09-28T12:30:00.003-05:00

VACATION CRITTERS
Here are a few photo'd & shop'd images of other animals that I have seen over the past several summers whilst on holidays.

Deer, Black Hills South Dakota

Dragonfly, Salmon Arms, British Columbia

Mallard, Fort Whyte Centre, Manitoba

Alligator, Reptile Gardens, South Dakota

Goat, Heritage Museum Steinbach, Mb

Garter Snake, Hecla Island, Mb

Field Mouse, Winnipeg Zoo, Mb

Reef Shark, Mall Of America, Minneapolis

Plover, Hecla Island, Mb

Pronghorn Antelope, Custer National Park, SD

Mountain Goat, Mount Rushmore, SD

Bighorn Sheep, Golden, British Columbia

Reba, foster puppy, next door

Canada Geese, Wpg, Mb

2010-09-27T12:29:00.002-05:00

FALLing OUT WITH FACEBOOK

It's become painfully obvious that 90% of my Facebook "Friends" who actually comment, or engage moi avec snappy repartee, are other bloggers..DUH!

I have no idea how many Lookie-Loos are lurking aboot so I may as well post here.

Backyard Photo'd & Shop'd.

2010-09-22T09:50:00.000-05:00

ESCAPEONS OOT OF AFRICA

What am I missing? Oh yeah the link between Empirical Evidence and Belief!

Before Darwin's theory 150 years ago Humans could be excused for believing in a magical supernatural cosmology wherein God plopped us down on the planet out of thin air....
and then in his infinite wisdom only told one f*cking guy about how his universe works...
and left that one guy in charge of letting the rest of us know about it?
Really?

That antiquated notion is simply too dangerous to be dropped in the lap of a few megalomaniacs who have proven time and time again, that they usually edit and redraft all the good bits, and abuse it as a license to impose their will upon others, and enslave them.

When our common ancestors started traipsing oot of Africa it wasn't because they were bored, or looking for an IKEA. Some climatic disaster drove them away. Which is why I refer to us as Homo Escapeons. An Eon means "age" or "forever". We've been running away from our problems for Eons.

To this day most Humans seem more concerned with where they think they are going when they die, rather than finding out how we got here. Most Earthlings are shackled by superstitious beliefs that exist without any empirical evidence...dogmas which are eventually tweaked and manipulated to justify and absolve themselves of murdering, dominating, and controlling the proverbial others.

There are no others!

The earliest Humanish predecessors (Erectus, yes it's always funny) left Africa around 1.8 million years ago. Antecessor left 800,000 ya, then Heidelbergensis (future Neanderthals?) 600,000 ya, and finally us (Sapiens-Sapiens) around 60,000 ya.

Genetic evidence suggests that every single Earthling descended from a few thousand people about 70,000 years ago. This 'bottleneck' may have been brought about by a one of the world's largest know volcanic eruptions at Lake Toba (Sumatra, Indonesia), which plunged the planet into a 6 to 10 year volcanic winter, followed by a further 1,000 year period of cooling.
We left Africa to escape a changing climate.

The oldest known anatomically modern human is aboot 160,000 years old.
Every single Earthling shares a common ancestor dubbed Mitochondrial Eve, who had genetic markers that are shared by all of us. She lived roughly 120-150 ya...
okay enough with the numbers!

Once we were oot of Africa, we were primarily Beachcombers, and eventually we made it to Australia (40,000 ya) and eventually North America. In these new places we sapiens eventually "replaced" the earlier bunch of African escapees like the Neanderthals..who had a pretty good run ..about 400,000 years twice as long as we've been around .

Zip forward tens of thousands of years and here we are...
staring at all of this hardfought data from the past few hundred years that the Religious organizations tried to stop and are still trying to stop!

Instead of accepting that we are all rellies and combining our efforts to solve our myriad of dilemmas, we refuse on the grounds that some of having an exclusivity clause with the Almighty. Most religious leaders do everything within their considerable powers to cloak shared historical information from ever reaching their adherents...for obvious reasons.

Most Earthlings are ordered to concentrate on the will of their supernatural God (to whom they claim exclusivity) so that they can escape THE END..whether THE END is their individual demise or that of the entire f*cking planet.

Prospective global terminal disasters include but are not limited to:
solar flares, supernovae, black hole explosions or mergers, gamma-ray bursts, galactic center outbursts, pollution, geological disasters, human infertility, global nuclear warfare, pandemic viral infections, all of which seem safe bets when compared to the various religious doomsday scenarios.

This gnashing of teeth is the result of watching Meryl Streep and Robert Redford in Out Of Africa. In that film Redford's character recognized that the natural world was on a collision with the Human world circa WW1.
I love the irony.

The imagery of the head-up-their-ass British Gentlemen's Club sipping G&Ts in the midst of the primal savagery and beauty of the Kenyan wilderness.
The British and German Royalty, cousins no less, have a territorial tiff to which the Gentleman merrily rush off to kill each other. Hear Hear!

We are ridiculous and we no longer have the luxury of ignoring the facts about who or what we are. It needs to stop.

Oot of Africa indeed!

2010-09-21T00:58:00.005-05:00

The Generation GAPS
There are actually several Generation gaps, none of which may interest you in the least. Well TFB I think it's fascinating.

"You don't know your past, you don't know your future." Ziggy Marley

Because nobody cares aboot Canadian Demographics or Politics, we will examine the American population distribution which is basically the same as Canada anyway, just 10 times larger.

If you look at the Democrat/Republican Party split between the cohorts, it is never more than a 3% diff, so basically a 50-50 tie. The good news is that Independent candidates are continuing to grow in popularity.

Gen Y 100 million
The Gen Yers are the techno-cyber generation who are already changing our world. There are aboot one bajillion of them, and they are going to do whatever they want, and I'll be dead in a few years anyway so.. whatev!
b. 1985-2010
25 yrs old and under
38% Dem 33% Rep 29% Ind
"As a homegrown labor force of epic size, they will stop immigration cold and restore manufacturing."

Gen X 69.5 m
The Xers have always lived under the shadow of the Boomers and Reagonomics and they seem to be perpetually pissed off about everything. I am absolutely certain that they will introduce 'Youth'anization drive-thru clinics to kill off the Boomers asap.
b. 1965-84
26-45 yrs old
38% Rep 36% Dem 25% Ind
"The housing market is tanking because Xers lack the critical mass to buy up the Boomers’ starter castles and will torpedo Social Security."

Baby Boomers 78.2 m
The Boomers are still waiting for their parents' generation (Silents) to die in a timely manner so that they can finally make some "real" change.
Grasshopper, what is the sound of one foot tapping?
b. 1945-65
46-65 yrs old
37% Dem 35% Rep 27% Ind
"Boomers won’t stop spending beyond their means and will bring strong opposition to the religious right and finally legalize marijuana."

Silent Generation 35.6 m
The Silents who all smoked like chimneys, ate red meat 3x day, drove drunk without the kids in seatbelts, and tossed garbage out the fkn car window....are already starting to crash the Health Care system.They will squander Trillion$ of the Boomers inheritance by trying to live forever.
b. 1925-45
66-85 yrs old
39% Dem 36% Rep 24% Ind
"The remnants of this tiny generation will give us the false impression that the longevity trend has reversed and will shut down the assisted-living industry"

GI Generation 5 mish
The last few GIs are not long for this world.They grew up during the Great Depression and they saved Trillion$. They are leaving all this moolah to the Silents, who as I mentioned, are unfortunately trying to live forever, but are actually crashing the Health Care system and squandering the inheritance that should have trickled down to the Boomers.
b. 1900-25
85 yrs old +
41% Rep 39% Dem 20% Ind
"They amassed personal wealth of nearly $11 trillion through saving and still wield corporate influence. The few remaining are living longer because they can afford the best health care. The last of many generations characterized by racial and gender intolerance."

Well, is it too obvious that I'm a Boomer? I tried to be fair..sort of.

Here are some of the sources which I manipulated to back up my half-baked, fanciful notions:The Age Curve, Census, Greenberg Research, and my own rash conclusions.

2010-08-22T09:25:00.002-05:00

STAYCATIONING IN LIMBO

..atleast until the dashing and debonair cyberpete decides to send me the Freakin Green Elf Shorts.
Click here to review the legacy and tradition of the FGES.

Otherwise, I'm fairly certain that I have said quite enough aboot "the insoluble contradiction of being animals cursed with self reflection, and moral beings cursed with animal instincts".

2010-06-28T16:40:00.005-05:00

THE VUVUZELIAN TRAGEDY

2010-06-15T23:21:00.001-05:00

I FIXED MY BLOG !

I just sat in the kitchen for what seemed like hours until I finally decided to switch back to a simple template and apparently it worked!

..and there was much rejoicing!

2010-06-12T22:54:00.009-05:00

MJ @ INFOMANIAC SHUT DOWN?!

I was caught off guard this morning when I saw a message from MJ telling me that her site Infomaniac had been shut down by Blogger. Her place was the most popular cyber watering hole and I have been visiting for five years. Over there everyone could let their hair down and speak their mind.

Sure it was outrageous, but she had a warning caution on her link.

She had not posted anything out of the ordinary...and there was almost always a hilarious collection of photos featuring either vintage soft porn 'nudie" photos or slovenly, disheveled, elderly gay men engaged in various acts of youknow :).

Not for everyone but nobody forced you to be there did they?

Those of us who visited every day were expecting to be treated to outrageous antics..that was part of the fun. MJ had a huge following of gay & lesbian bloggers, prolly aboot 2/3rds, and it was a safe place to explore, support, and partake in a world that is still unfortunately reviled and misunderstood by many.

I suspect that some homophobe(s) on the Blogger Content Panel may have panicked and cut her off...even though there were never any depictions that could be interpreted as non consenting adults?

I clicked on the Blogger Content Policy to see what it actually reads:

"Blogger is a free service for communication, self-expression and freedom of speech.

We believe Blogger increases the availability of information, encourages healthy debate, and makes possible new connections between people.

We respect our users' ownership of and responsibility for the content they choose to share.

It is our belief that censoring this content is contrary to a service that bases itself on freedom of expression.

In order to uphold these values, we need to curb abuses that threaten our ability to provide this service and the freedom of expression it encourages. As a result, there are some boundaries on the type of content that can be hosted with Blogger. The boundaries we've defined are those that both comply with legal requirements and that serve to enhance the service as a whole.

Adult Content:

We do allow adult content on Blogger, including images or videos that contain nudity or sexual activity. But, please mark your blog as 'adult' in your Blogger settings.

Otherwise, we may put it behind a 'mature content' interstitial.

There are some exceptions to our adult content policy:
Do not use Blogger as a way to make money on adult content.

For example, don't create blogs where a significant percentage of the content is ads or links to commercial porn sites.
We do not allow image, video or text content that depicts or encourages incest or bestiality.

Crude Content:

Don't post content just to be shocking or graphic.

For example, collections of close-up images of gunshot wounds or accident scenes without additional context or commentary would violate this policy.

Our team reviews these flags for policy violations.

If the blog does not violate our policies, we will not take any action against the blog or blog owner.

If we find that a blog does violate our content policies, we take one or more of the following actions based on the severity of the violation:

Put the blog behind a 'mature content' interstitial
Put the blog behind an interstitial where only the blog author can access the content
Delete the blog
Disable the author's access to his/her Blogger account
Disable the author's access to his/her Google account
Report the user to law enforcement"

So I am confused as to why the sudden seizure?

No warnings, just BANG!

How would you feel if years of interactive moments shared in the comment section vanished.

I hope that they send her an explanation, an apology, and a Bajillion Dollars!

It troubles me that the Interwebs is getting so uber-interactive and controlled...during the last couple of years all of the media outlets...

TV, newspapers and zines all jumped in the blogosphere and flooded it with filler and the same crap that they need to feed the 24/7 monster.

Now Facebook and Google and Twitter all want to share my Blog and Youtube favorites and MP3 files and

...it's getting a little too connected and CONTROLLED.

I can say things out here that I can't on Fb..atleast I thought that I could?

MJ, I hope you know how much fun I had at your place..it's where I met most of my oldest Blogmates. It was THE meeting spot, the likes of which I shall never see again..until you get back..which you will..you must!

L U xx oo

2010-06-07T01:15:00.003-05:00

DEM-ographics
"You cannot reorganize village life to suit the village idiot."
Frank Schaeffer

I recently received a fabulous book from a very thoughtful Blogger.

It's The Daring Spectacle by Mark Morford...a "kick-ass, take-no-prisoners, laugh-out-loud-funny Liberal writer, thinker and cultural critic.

"Believe that you are part of a groundswell, a resistance, a seemingly small but actually very large impending karmic overhaul, a great shift, the beginning of something important and potent and unstoppable."

Here is an example of his insightful snarkasm:
How to talk to complete idiots

2010-06-01T00:06:00.008-05:00

GRAPEVINE GOSPEL

Do you know what I don't understand?

Why on earth would (insert personal deity of choice here) decide to only tell one dude about all of his rules & regulations, and then expect everybody else to know exactly what he said to that guy?

No, really?!
Why not just tell everyone at the same time?

That way, nobody could make up any weird sh*t about food and clothes and blowing yourself up.

Just sayin'.

2010-05-27T13:59:00.000-05:00

GLOBAL FINANCIAL CRISIS?

Apparently the crumbling of the EU is bolstering the American Dollar..
which is great news for it's owners, China.

To better understand how close mankind is to reinstituting the Gold Standard, the final stage before we start trading in sea shells, cigarettes, and human skulls, the following link offers an invaluable synopsis of the sitch.

HERE

Sheesh!
Why can't the other News outlets keep it this simple?

2010-05-23T01:11:00.004-05:00

THE 12 DEADLY SINS

I found THIS article aboot the 12 most annoying stereotypes of people on Facebook..where I currently waste most of my time. The first thing that I noticed was that this prolly applies to Yours Truly and to many other Bloggers as well.

I have no doubt that others can pin a few of these labels on moi.
I may not even be aware of how I am perceived.
Here's what I think...

The Lurkers..
according to my visitor list they make up the silent majority of people in the Blogosphere...usually 10 times the number of comments. I always try to comment.

The Let-Me-Tell-You-Every-Detail-of-My-Day Bore...met a few but not-so-much. If something out of the ordinary occurs I write aboot it. I shared a few holiday adventures.

The Self-Promoter...most of us want readers right ?
I try not to be too obvious..oh, except for my quarterly meltdowns and whinging aboot it.

The Friend-Padder...
those ginormous blogrolls are hard to miss and don't usually reflect the number of people interacting on the blog. I dug my hole by linking 200 other blogs and tried to keep up...not possible.

The Town Crier..
guilty, most of us are. Who amongst us hasn't advanced breaking news as if the world depended on it..hahaha...like nobody else has Google?

The TMI-er,
OMG I suppose the Vaswrecktomy series speaks for itself. I tried not to divulge much aboot my real world and focussed on BIG PICTURE topics..like some half-assed lecturer..gawd what an asshat...begin shame spiral now!

The Bad Grammarian..
My greatest sin may not be my syntax but my rudimentary command of the Inglush Langwidge has been brought to my attention on many occasions..whatev?

The Sympathy-Baiter..
I don't think so..I don't usually do the woe is me thingamabob..not intentionally anyway...except for the Vaswrecktomy.

The Crank...if I do go on a rant it was always with the intention of being sarcastic and funny...most of my circle of bloggers are fairly like-minded so my venom is aimed at their object of derision..that's fun, who doesn't love that?

The Paparazzo...I love to skewer celebs and politicians because they are public domain and it's fun.

The Chronic Inviter...not too many causes anymore but in the beginning I was inclined to hop on board to build relationships..now meh.
I just have a few pets like Fair Vote Canada and Seal Whacking.

The Obscurist...Moi nonsensical and mysterious? Often I suppose..but mostly unintentional because I didn't offer enough clues as to what the hell I was talking aboot.

So there it 'tiz! In a nutshell I appear to be an egregiously tedious little poseur.
Tsl tsk. I think that I got over myself a few years ago and realised that I am just some f*cking guy.

I loved to float around different "clicks" and engage in their pet peeves and pleasures. All in all I met so many cool people out here. I hope that I wasn't too ridiculous. ..it was the most interesting and self revealing thing that I've prolly ever done.

Perhaps I should have had a lash at my mission statement more often.

Why do Humans persist on doing the same sh*t over and over and over?

That is why I call us Homo ESCAPEONS...not only have we escaped eons of opportunities to correct our behavior and make this world a better place, we continue to escape reality by slavishly worshipping money, status and celebrity.

2010-05-13T00:05:00.005-05:00

DRAWING TO CONCLUSIONS

This was bound to happen.

I am deeply saddened and troubled that the silent majority of moderate Muslims seem to have been bullied into submission. It is sadly ironic that Islam means "one who submits" because Islam seems to have been successfully hijacked by the extremists.

The result of their failure to unite, intervene, and organise a rescue of their Faith, has led to a potential catastrophe for all of us.

Most of us have Muslim friends who are as horrified of these violent Theocratists as you or I. Unfortunately the collision of the free modern world and these radical politico-religious opportunists (Islamists) and their frenzied frightful mobs of uninformed envious zealots, is set to erupt.

The patience of moderate everyday citizens has been stretched to the limit. It is frustratingly ironic that these revolutionaries cannot even comprehend WHY they are allowed to spew their hatred in the streets. They have abused their privileges far beyond any reasonable expectation of tolerance.

So here we are astride a ticking time bomb..
one bullet away from releasing a tsunamic surge of years and years of percolating resentment and frustration.

If the New World is so horrible then why come..
and even more baffling, why attempt to impose these 7th Century dogmatic restrictions upon the infidels? Why must they destroy the system which at some point in time must have held some allure?

This is not about Religious Freedom and cultural tolerance. It is a real attempt to insitute a new global Caliphate...
which is being sponsored by many of the West's so-called 'Oil'lies in the Middle East.

A conflict of this magnitude will bring our world to it's knees...and all for what?

I've always hoped that we would never have to witness another World War...
and this one would almost certainly involve limited Nuclear strikes because some of these nimrods live in countries which unfortunately stockpile these monstrous weapons..

Bullys always look for signs of weakness...
these instigators view tolerance and patience as weakness...
they have made an egregious miscalculation.

Standing up to a bully is not the same as turning the other cheek and even a very small animal can become vicious and dangerous when they are backed into a corner.

I don't know about you but I am genuinely scared of what may come of this.

The narrator of this video is right, that FREEDOM is non-negotiable. However inciting these activists is a recipe for disaster..
perhaps this confrontation is a calculated risk worth taking, maybe even a neccessity?

The West is responsible for letting it get this out of hand. From the getgo we were caught off guard ...
because historically the majority of our new citizens were Caucasian Christians of various denominations who, for the most part, left their native lands to escape Millenia of this exact sort of religious strife and political conflict. We just expected foreigners to make adjustments to fit in. We were lazy.

What also helped was the fact that we were largely unaware, or even interested for that matter, as to what other Earthlings were doing beyond our borders..
especially on the other side of the world.

Now we live in a 24/7 instant newsfed world and little escapes our attention. Most of the Good Neighbour fences have been dismantled. We're all living on top of each other and it's too much for us.

Our species is naturally clannish and wary of others. Somehow after millions were slaughtered in territorial and economical wars, we managed to adjust our perspective...mainly because most of us accepted the golden rules.

You do your thing and I'll do mine as long we understand that it's a two-way street.

Were we living in a totally secular world, impossible but worth aiming for, we'd certainly find other things to squabble about and kill each other.

That being said the Islamists on deck don't care about living in this world. Securing a new address in their imaginary supernatural destination would be a vast improvement on their present circumstances...
which of course they blame on the West.

I don't profess to have any valid solutions other than instigating measures to take a global time out and let cooler heads prevail.
Whatever we're doing now is not going to work in the long run.

At some point I suppose a declaration of expectations at the Immigration Office should become mandatory. Do whatever you like on Friday, Saturday and Sunday, if you must, and leave the supernatural out of the day to day.

We already have enough global obstacles to combat and secure our survival without all of the manmade cosmological add-ons.

2010-05-04T23:38:00.000-05:00

IRONY MAN

I spent so much time over here poo-pooing Facebook, and yet, there I am.

2010-04-24T11:51:00.001-05:00

NO THUGS IN OUR HOUSE

UGH

This country functions and flourishes BECAUSE it is designed to function WITHOUT perpetuating the traditional irrational violent religious rivalries fueled by sociopathic zealots who fuel hatred, prejudice, cruelty, and intolerance.

These antiquated practices haunt the Old World and history has shown that it led to nothing but an endless cycle of war. Millions of men, women and children were needlessly tortured and murdered for thousands of years. An insane inexcusable unforgivable waste of human life.

It is one thing for citizens to practice and promote the peaceful positive aspects of their belief system.
If however, the radical fringe elements intent is to bully others into submission, demand exclusive rights, or threaten anyone else with their own self-serving brand of insane supernatural delusions of grandeur, the f*cking airport is thataway..we'll even pay your airfare....
and don't come back..
ever..no, not even for a visit.

We tippy-toe around the political correctness ..ooh better not hurt the feelings of people honoring assassins in blatant contradiction to the Law?
Sadly this is a charade and not about forming another "Stan" country, it's about a few assholes trying to gain control of power and money on a local level..
the whole liberation-theology fascade is a cover.

Fortunately the lure of the decadent West and an education based on empirical science will release the majority of the next generation from the mind control of the militants.

UGH!!!

2010-04-23T19:12:00.002-05:00

A CLERICAL ERROR !!
"Many women who do not dress modestly ... lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society, which (consequently) increases earthquakes," Iranian cleric Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi.

I titally support this cause

2010-04-22T11:24:00.000-05:00

THE ANALITY OF EVIL

What really frightens me...

2010-04-21T09:31:00.001-05:00

THE ANGLE OF THE DANGLE

"What is life but the angle of vision?

A man is measured by the angle at which he looks at objects."
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Am i right?

2010-04-09T12:30:00.001-05:00

Paused Error Tea

For the first time since February 2006, I went for One Entire Month Without Blogging!

Next I'll archive 52 postings for each year and toss the rest upon the bonfire of my vanity.

Over the years I managed to siphon most of my fanciful notions into my posts and purposefully created my own cosmological handbook.

Now that my Coppensian comprehensive is complete I feel compelled to free up some extra space on the Interwebs for future generations to squander.

It was a great way to find me.

2010-03-05T08:22:00.008-06:00

I used to Blog..
but you know what?

My throaway 'spur of the moment' posts always had better responses than the gilgameshian epics which I had painstakingly researched and spent hours fact checking and captioning photos...

that drove me f*cking crazy!

All of which explains why I am now inconsolably despondent and wandering aimlessly oot & "whooring aboot" the slums of Facebook, begging for scraps of attention from long-lost cousins, and a smattering of former co-workers, old friends, and schoolmates and people I've never met.

It's pathetic, but somehow it feels as if a karmic-cosmic justice has been served.

My intention is to keep visiting your Blogs so see you around...

2010-02-26T09:16:00.003-06:00

THE CYBERBUZZCLOG

A few years ago when I started blogging all of the activities seemed compartmentalized.

Then the INDUSTRIAL blogging started and soon every Newspaper and Magazine writer jumped on the bandwagon.

You couldn't swing a cat without hitting another blogger.

Now the same story/BUZZ/ newsfeed is overlapping the interwebs from blogland to every corner of the social mediasphere.
You see the "sameverything" over and over.

A correction is imminent.

2010-02-25T09:02:00.002-06:00

"Buy Land, they ain't makin' any more of the stuff"
Will Rogers

ATTENTION EXTRATERRESTRIALS!
In the market for a house on Earth Street?
Well look no further my friend!
Here are the current listings that your intergalctic real estate agent could show you.

1.LIST PRICE = the Population of the Continent

2.SQUARE FOOTAGE = continental area in kilometres, add 000s

3.OWNERS = number of countries on the continent

4.OCCUPANTS = 1 person = 50 million+ etc

5.MORTGAGE RATE
= % Of People on Earth

'modern amenities with old world charm'
EUROPE
listed @ $729,000,000

is a 1,039 sf House on the East Side.
The MORTGAGE documents list 41 owners but you can't help but notice 3 people from RUSSIA (who spend most of their time in the Asia House) and 1 GERMAN, FRENCH, ITALIAN, BRITISH and UKRAINIAN.
*10% O.A.P.

'breath taking ocean view'
OCEANIA
listed @ $32,700,000

is a 850 sf House on the East Side.
The Mortgage documents list 13 owners but it looks empty. I notice a kangaroo plush toy on the floor.
*.5% O.A.P.

'make us an offer'
ANTARCTICA

is a vacant 1,372 sf House at the end of the street. The furnace is broken. *0% O.A.P.

'spacious and overloaded with amenities'
NORTH AMERICA
listed @ $885,000,000

is a 2,448 sf House on the West Side.
The mortgage documents list 27 owners.
There are 5 people from the U.S.in the living room and 2 from MEXICO in the sunroom.
Although you can't see them there are Canadians living in the attic. You can't see the Carribeans living around a heated pool or the Central Americans in the breezeway that is connected to the South American House next door.
*13% O.A.P.

'roomy rustic spanish style'
SOUTH AMERICA

listed @ $371,000,000

is a 1,784 sf House on the West Side.
The Mortgage documents list 12 owners but ay carumba!
you'll see 4 people from Brazil in very skimpy bathing suits .

*5% O.A.P.

'a must see for wildlife enthusiasts'
AFRICA
listed @ $887,000,000

is a big 3,030 sf House on the East Side.
The Mortgage documents list 54 owners.
Say hello to 2 people from Nigeria and 1 from Egypt, Ethiopia, Zaire and Lybia.
There are way more people here but this place is huge!
*13% O.A.P.

'fabulous kitchen and rugs'
ASIA
listed @ $3,900,000,000

is a huge 4,950 sf House on the East Side.
The Mortgage documents list 52 owners!
Yells, Bells and Smells!
I count 22 people from China and another 20 from India! There are 4 from Indonesia! Wait there is 2 from Pakistan,Japan and Bangladesh!
Hold on there is 1 from Iran,Turkey,Thailand and the Phillipines.
*60% O.A.P!

How much was Antarctica again?
Maybe we can fix the furnace?

2010-02-17T12:30:00.000-06:00

SIGNS OF INTELLIGENT LIFE ON FACEBOOK

My favorite line in THE LOST WORLD Jurassic Park 2.
I placed it on this poster which I proudly added to a group called;
IF 65 MILLION PEOPLE JOIN, GOD WILL BRING BACK THE DINOSAURS.

Now you know why I'm still stuck over there. Call it microblogging or whatever you want..the format is superior and there is a revolution taking place.

FB is being overtaken by the smartasses!

Most folks don't even realise it yet. They are the proverbial frogs in the pot who haven't noticed that the water temperature is slowly rising...they will be gone before they ever realise that they are boiling.

This is not a drill..it is happening before my eyes and I want to be a part of it!

2010-02-16T12:59:00.001-06:00

THE GREATEST GUITAR EVER RECORDED

I have been listening to Rock for over 45 years and I have never heard a better rockin' guitar song..ever.

Perhaps because it was the early 70s and I was coming of age in smoke filled recrooms soaked in black lights...but no other air-guitar solo has ever compared with this masterpiece.

THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT ROCK GUITAR IS SUPPOSED TO SOUND LIKE!
Most people have never heard of Aphrodite's_Child
but a few of you have heard of one of the members.. Vangelis_ ..Chariots of Fire.

This is a homemade tribute not a real video but CRANK IT @ 11 .

2010-02-12T14:04:00.002-06:00

The SUEnited States Of America

Congratulations America.
As the most litigious people on the planet your society is malfunctioning.
If you live in SUE S. A. perhaps you need a copy of this BOOK
..maybe a couple..one in the car, one at work, one at home.

Actually, you should sue the Government for not giving you a copy!!

This recent story perfectly demonstrates how governments and corporations are so worried about covering their ass, that this paranoia of facing liability seems to have superceded the last shred of decency and common sense.

These rent-a-cop so-called "guards" are just there for decoration and to stop the occasional suicidal person from jumping in front of a corporate train in a public area. They have orders to observe and report...
is that useless or what?

Seriously, how much longer can the average American afford to live under the ubiquitous gaze of ambulance chasing lowlife lawyers and their greedy willing accomplices?

What is up with these spineless security guards..
oh I know they are following their orders..
but for the price of three useless rent-a-cops they could probably afford a real cop that could have intervened, restrained, and maybe even tasered that psychotic little bitch into submission.

I can't wait to see photos of these three spineless wussy asshats..
how could all three of them stand there and watch a 15 year old girl get kicked in the head...
especially since she ran over to them and asked for protection?

Here is an American Dude who sued Guiness Book Of World Records for being named the most litigious person in the world.

Unbef*ckinglievable!

2010-02-08T14:34:00.000-06:00

PEOPLE GET READY

There's a-Palin comin'..

You don't need no baggage
might as well hop onboard
All you need is fate
to hear the disaster hummin'
Don't need no GOP ticket
you just thank, you just thank the Lord

2010-02-01T15:43:00.003-06:00

DIMINISHING MARGINAL RETURNS

In a fixed production system (blogosphere) with fixed and variable inputs (time left on Earth and decaying attention spans) there will be a point beyond which each additional blog post yields smaller and smaller interest and gratification (work to fun ratio).

So now I'm off to try Twittering for a month.

I was FaceBooking during January and it's a great site that is incredibly under-utilized by the great unwashed.

The vast majority of users just want to keep it "Lite" and talk about themselves and their day...about once a week?

Most of the time I found it very hard to contain myself and adhere to the 90s style netiquette...knowing that the rellies and neighbours are staring blankly at your blather.

After spending years in the blogosphere, it just felt like nobody knew what to do with this forum (except the Bloggers) and those infernal f*cking applications/games suck the last drop of oxygen out of the room.

I guess that people go there to relax and get away from bloggers.

So now I'll see if Twitter is anything more than a glorified link site.

I've been there for years

but since I'm not much of a celebrity stalker, or plugging a book, I haven't really bothered to give it a chance.

2010-01-27T11:12:00.000-06:00

EVILution
Only 39% of Americans believe in Evilution!

In a recent Gallop poll , 25% admitted that they do NOT believe in Evolution.

Even more baffling is that 36% don't even have an opinion...1% don't know if they have an opinion!

Only about half of Americans aged 18 to 34 say they believe in evolution.

(I added the quip but props to Propps)

The pollster summarized these findings with this stunning revelation;
"Americans' religious beliefs are a significant predictor of their attitudes toward Darwin's theory!"

Ya think?

"There is a strong relationship between education and belief in Darwin's theory, as might be expected, ranging from 21% of those with high-school educations or less,

to 74% of those with postgraduate degrees."

The Good News for Modern Man is that 55% of Americans believe in "the Rapture,"

so before our world ends, those who denounce Darwinsky, will be spared and mysteriously taken up to Heaven in the blink of an eye.

I am presuming that after "the Rapture",
the stats for the 36 percenters without an opinion on Evolution, will dramatically decrease.
Those poor "left behinders" will be much too busy looting the vacant homes and bank accounts of the Faithful to answer stupid surveys on Evilution.

2010-01-22T13:35:00.000-06:00

This is what happens when you spend too much time on Facebook
:)

2010-01-11T22:59:00.002-06:00

I'm taking a month off, maybe a year, to read your blogs, find new blogs, and hang out on Facespace...

2010-01-07T14:09:00.005-06:00

HOW THE MIGHTY HUV FAWWEN

Wom monff waatah an Tiffah Wooffs if sti miffing!

Pehfohawy, I donh watth Goff, tho I don weawy cah.

wah-effa?

Ah wed thumweh tha heeth hettin fum new fwunt teef..

juth wi awl tha hawhee hayherth do.

Buh Tiffah Wooffs wuth tha bihheth fawebwity ohn tha pwanet.

Na hif hoody-thoo-thooth imath haf bin ahithewated, an a moth of hith thontheths haf weft ham hi ahn dwy.

Buh Goff neeths hum fo tha wateenths, tho I ethpeth ha be bah in spwing.

Wy do we ethpeth tho muth fwum mihawoneh fawebwiteeth anywaaf?

Tha ohwy humah beweenf juf wike uff!

2010-01-06T08:31:00.003-06:00

KISSIN' CAUSEIN'S !?

rehashed from March 08

Don't worry I'm not going to ask you to tell me your favorite Big Screen Smooch..

you can if you want to...

but, have you ever wondered if we homo escapeons simply mimic passionate "Movie" kissing or is that type of kissing natural?

Once you have seen one of these torrid smooches on a giant screen aren't you disappointed if you don't receive an earth-moving Kiss?

This same logic dictates the reason that ordinary people should NOT watch porn.

The success of do-it-yourself sites like YouPorn prove once and for all that regular folks will be devastatingly discouraged by their 'shortcomings' if they try to mimic the Herculean performances of the Pros...

not to mention the abscence of all those ridiculously embelleshed 'bits' on display that most of us are neither born with n'or can we afford to implant them.

Do you suppose that prehistorical Cavemen tried hanging upside down or rolling in the surf having slurpy kisses?

Back in 1967 the author of The Naked Ape, Desmond Morris, suggested that mutual sexual gratification (Ladies Stop Laughing) was the key to securing a pair bond which was essential for successfully raising offspring.

He said that our species evolved by choosing mates with less hair and therefore more errogenous zones, female breasts became portruding, hemispherical, eye-magnets to divert the males attention to the front, so that we could invent the missionary position, which developed as a way to make reproducing more enjoyable.....

and it was easier to kiss.

OK scrub your brains and let's try to focus on just Kissing..oh wait....

This Kiss/Sex thingamabob reminds me of my favorite scene in Monty Python's Meaning Of Life when John Cleese is teaching Sex-Ed to the remarkably, disinterested, pupils.

Whilst discussing foreplay he says,

"What's wrong with a kiss, boy?

Hmm?

Why not start her off with a nice kiss?

You don't have to go leaping straight for the clitoris like a bull at a gate.

Give her a kiss, boy ."

According to Wiki;

-Anthropologists haven't reached a consensus as to whether Kissing is a learned or instinctive behavior

-Kissing may may be related to grooming behavior or may be the result of mammalian mothers premasticating..that's MASTICATING..

food for their children in order to recognize biological dangers to their offspring

-Kissing allows prospective mates to smell and taste each other's hornymones (also know as pheromones) for biological compatibility

-Ladies are subconsciously more attracted to men whose major histocompatibility complex portion of their genome is different from their own; leading to offspring with resistance to a greater number of diseases due to heterosis, and thus having a better chance of survival...

which is why we put the kibosh on Kissin' Cousins!

This explains why couples are more likely to bond if they have the right chemistry ! This tedious examination sort of takes all the mystery out of Life doesn't it?

So the hell with that.

Q. Of all the kisses that you've ever had, what percentage of those would be face-sucking, skull-drilling, take-me-now, make-me-lose-control, lip locking...

and how often do you want it?

2010-01-04T00:27:00.000-06:00

EMOTIONS CARRIED
THE EYES HAVE IT
circa March 06

The basic shape of my eyes is the result of combining the DNA of my parents..

but there is much more to this than meets the eye.

My Father's eyes sparkled with curiousity

My Mother's eyes scrutinized

How I see the world is partially the byproduct of observing how they viewed the world.

Likewise, how I look at things will affect how my children will examine their universe.

If I could pluck up the courage, I would shape my caterpillars (thanks Dad) with the hope of looking as dashing as Tyrone Power...whatever.

People take notice of your perceptions.

Sometimes people see what they want to see.

Do you let them see the real you?

Do you try to see what they see?

Are you taking a hard look at Life?

2009-12-30T13:53:00.001-06:00

FOREIGNERS MUST STOP EATING

by LORD TENNISANYONE

Pursuant to my recent reply to an electronic article published by my dear associate and ardent Large Hadron Collider denier, Vicus Scurra , concerning the Queen's 2009 message regarding the dietary peculiarities of foreigners, it suddenly occurred to me, that the greatest challenge of the new decade will be how we manage to preserve our beloved exotic animals and allow foreigners to share our planet.

Sadly those people have brought this all upon themselves. Unable to control their primal urges they fight amongst themselves and breed exponentially.
Due to their self inflicted circumstance they are in the midst of subsequently eviscerating their local biospeheres where our beloved exotic animals live.
Bad form I say.

On the darkest of continents these people thoughtlessly trespass on our Game Preserves at will and shoot anything that bloody moves. Known locally as "Bush Meat" these foreigners are systematically eating our cousins, the Bonobos and Chimpanzees.

Dare I say that during the Colonial era in Africa the locals weren't allowed to tamper with our Game and everything seemed to be in order.
Now the whole bloody thing is out of sorts.

As if that wasn't enough of a perturbance, these foreigners also massacre Elephants, Tigers, Gorillers, and Rhinos, leave the carcasses to rot, and sell their tusks, horns, paws, and penii, so that other foreigners can get boners, carve trinkets, and make bloody knife handles.

These voracious little buggers send huge floating factories into our bloody oceans to net, vacuum, dynamite, and harpoon anything that bloody swims or crawls..including our whales.

With all the fish nearly gone from the actions of these inconsiderate uppity foreigners, vicious Seals have started attacking and feeding upon my fellow Colonists.

One can hardly believe that these heartless bastards perform the barbaric practice of hacking the fins off of millions of bloody sharks every year, dumping the rest of the dying creatures into the water, in order to make expen$ive bloody soup to supposedly bring good luck and get boners.

Unfortunately eating our cousin Apes which have 99% of our DNA isn't the most egregious violation. What will eventually tip the scale and force us to take affirmative action is the irreconcilable practice of eating our beloved best furiends...

Dogs.
Bloody Hell!

My old chum Charlie Darwin would not have been surprised at our discovery that all large megafauna were obliterated and became extinct as we marched out of Africa and conquered the other continents.

The animals that evolved alongside of us in Africa had enough bloody sense to run away or eat us. The new species that we encountered were thick as a post and just stood there as we poked them with sharp objects.

The fossil record shows that we annihilated the competing predatory species and inadvertently upset the natural balance allowing the prey animals to overpopulate and devour their food supply whilst succumbing to accompanying disease, before we killed and ate them all.

Nowadays it's bloody well impossible to enjoy a tender butter-roasted Dodo...

not to mention that a proper Gentlemen can no longer even enjoy a pleasant afternoon bagging a Thylacine ?!

pity.

That being said, we in the modern world have taken responsibilty for the missteps of our ancestors and developed an inexhaustable supply of frankencritters on huge factory farms....
so why can't those foreigners figure it out?

We want to be able to enjoy hunting and photographing the exotic animals on safari in our far off lands and if these foreigners wish to continue sharing our planet, then they must stop eating our animals and especially our furiends.
My Word!

2009-12-21T00:29:00.004-06:00

SEASONS BLEATINGS

I'm sort of working on my year end review but I also have to go oot & aboot all week and entertain my family, friends, and rellies.

I do have about 50 drafts on deck but they are all egregiously tedious and mind numbingly exhaustive.

Hopefully I will find the time to hand out some awards to those of you who manage to astound/inform/ridicule and entertain me all year...
some I've just met, but most are repeat offenders.

This year I somehow managed to add over 180 postings to the elecronic interwebs (52 on VC ) so I'm tired.

I've already rehashed everything I've ever thought of atleast twice anyway...

so screw it!

Have fun and stay out of trouble.

I'll see you soon...

maybe...

prolly before the New Year...

meh...

we'll see?

2009-12-14T23:46:00.007-06:00

WHY IS YESHUA'S BIRTHDAY A MYTHTERY?

Hmm, have you ever wondered why people celebrate Yeshua ben Yosuf's birthday in the middle of freakin' winter?

Call me crazy, but if you're planning to convince others that the turning point in the history of the entire universe was the miracle birth of a saviour, not only would it be the worst kept secret of all time, it would have probably been a good idea for someone to write down the actual day..
just sayin'?

Anyhoo, Yeshua's actual birthdate is as unknowable as the reason he waited in outer space during the millions of years of human evolution?
It's almost as if he spun the Earth, closed his eyes, and decided to drop in wherever his finger landed.

The best historical and scholarly guesstimaters tell us that Yeshua was prolly born in Nazareth, not Bethlehem, during April in the year 5 B.C. (Before Christ)..Got that?

December seems totally goofy because Yeshua prolly wasn't born after Rosh Hashana, which falls at different times during our "Julian" September because in Israel, this is when the flocks came down out of the pastures and mountains and stayed in stables.

C'mon, you remember the quaint part of the story aboot the Shepherds who were out pretending to watch their flocks by night. The shepherds were totally amazed when an angel appeared before them and said Fear not, for I bring you great tidings of glad joy!

Here is my conception of what Glad Joy and her "great tidings" may have looked like.

Unfortunately, we're stuck with December 25th because of Constantine the Grrrrrreat!
aka Caesar-Flavius-Valerius-Aurelius-Constantinus-Augustus, who became sole ruler of the Holey Roman Empire in 323.

Constantine's half-assed conversion to Christianity is debated by many scholars, however, he selected December 25th to celebrate Christmas because

A: it was a very calculated, politically-astute, manouever to circumvent Sol Invictus and overshadow the weeklong celebrations of Christianity's main rival, Mithraism.
Along with their own pantheon of Roman Gods which they pretty much stole from the Greeks, the Romans had also enjoyed a long standing worhsip of Mithras, the Persian Sun god...
so basically just changing Sun to Son geddit?

B: plus the week ending Dec. 24 was the celebration of Saturnalia, which also wasn't very appropriate for baby Yeshua's birthday party due to the drunken debauchery and fertility rites which must have been super fun.

In closing we need to remember that Constantine 1 the Great is also famous for
>being a Christian Saint and revered for his contributions to Christianity
>feeding defeated kings and their soldiers to the beasts in the amphitheater,
>decapitating and parading the head of rival Maxentius before sending it off to warn the "haters",
>poisoning his eldest son Crispus,
>and having his wife, the Empress Fausta, boiled to death at the request of his mother.

What a guy!
I hope that his helps.

2009-12-11T16:13:00.003-06:00

Resqueakiem for an Intruder

Wise words by Scott Alexander

CANADIAN CUSTOMS

2009-12-09T11:35:00.006-06:00

CHRISTMAS IN CANADA

2009-12-08T23:43:00.001-06:00

THE LONGEST YARN

A few years ago when I had a few readers and blogging was fun, someone named Anonymous left the longest comment ever.
It seems quite spamish, but if you injected yourself with an accelerant and zipped through it, you can tell that it was written by a human doing a stream of consciousness thing.

Start scrollin-scrollin-scrollin...
and no I don't expect you to read it....Hel-LO?!

"Greed kills: and heres how
Amazing. The first ever global depression will go down in history horribly misunderstood. What a pathetic bunch of ignorant fools we have become. Consumer junkie credit card morons. Perfect little victims. Say that reminds me.
Don’t believe one optimistic word from any public figure about the economy or humanity in general. They are all part of the problem. Its like a game of Monopoly. In America, the richest 1% now hold ALMOST 1/2 OF ALL UNITED STATES WEALTH. Unlike ‘lesser’ estimates, this includes all stocks, bonds, cash, offshore accounts, and material assets held by America’s richest 1%. Even that filthy pig Oprah acknowledged that it was at about 50% in 2006. Naturally, she put her own ‘humanitarian’ spin on it. Calling attention to her own ‘good will’.

WHAT A DISGUSTING HYPOCRITE SLOB. THE RICHEST ONE PERCENT HAVE LITERALLY MADE WORLD PROSPERITY ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE. Don’t fall for any of their ‘humanitarian’ CRAP. ITS A SHAM. THESE PEOPLE ARE CAUSING THE SAME PROBLEMS THEY PRETEND TO CARE ABOUT. Ask any professor of economics. Money does not grow on trees. The government can’t just print up more on a whim. At any given time, there is a relative limit to the wealth within ANY economy of ANY size. So when too much wealth accumulates at the top, the middle class slip further into debt and the lower class further into poverty. A similar rule applies worldwide. The world’s richest 1% now own over 40% of ALL WORLD WEALTH. This is EVEN AFTER you account for all of this ‘good will’ ‘humanitarian’ BS from celebrities and executives.

ITS A SHAM. As they get richer and richer, less wealth is left circulating beneath them. This is the single greatest underlying cause for the current US recession. The middle class can no longer afford to sustain their share of the economy. Their wealth has been gradually transfered to the richest 1%. One way or another, we suffer because of their incredible greed. We are talking about TRILLIONS of dollars which have been transfered FROM US TO THEM. All over a period of about 27 years. Thats Reaganomics for you. The wealth does not ‘trickle down’ as we were told it would. It just accumulates at the top. Shrinking the middle class and expanding the lower class. Causing a domino effect of socio-economic problems. But the rich will never stop. They just keep getting richer. Leaving even less of the pie for the other 99% of us to share. At the same time, they throw back a few tax deductible crumbs and call themselves ‘humanitarians’. Cashing in on the PR and getting even richer the following year. IT CAN’T WORK THIS WAY.

Their bogus efforts to make the world a better place can not possibly succeed. Any ‘humanitarian’ progress made in one area will be lost in another. EVERY SINGLE TIME. IT ABSOLUTELY CAN NOT WORK THIS WAY. This is going to end just like a game of Monopoly. The current US recession will drag on for years and lead into the worst US depression of all time. The richest 1% will live like royalty while the rest of us fight over jobs, food, and gasoline. So don’t fall for any of this PR CRAP from Hollywood, Pro Sports, and Wall Street PIGS. ITS A SHAM. Remember: They are filthy rich EVEN AFTER their tax deductible contributions. Greedy pigs. Now, we are headed for the worst economic and cultural crisis of all time. Crime, poverty, and suicide will skyrocket. SEND A “THANK YOU” NOTE TO YOUR FAVORITE MILLIONAIRE. ITS THEIR FAULT.

I’m not discounting other factors like China, sub-prime, or gas prices. But all of those factors combined still pale in comparison to that HUGE transfer of wealth to the rich. Anyway, those other factors are all related and further aggrivated because of GREED. If it weren’t for the OBSCENE distribution of wealth within our country, there never would have been such a market for sub-prime to begin with. IF IT WEREN’T FOR THE OBSCENE, UNREASONABLE, AND UNJUST DISTRIBUTION OF UNITED STATES WEALTH, THERE NEVER WOULD HAVE BEEN SUCH A MARKET FOR SUB-PRIME AND THERE NEVER WOULD HAVE BEEN A COLLAPSE IN THE HOUSING MARKET. Sub-prime did not cause the problem. It only accelerated the outcome. Which by the way, was another trick whipped up by greedy bankers and executives. IT MAKES THEM RICHER. The credit industry has been ENDORSED by people like Oprah Winfrey, Ellen DeGeneres, Dr Phil, and many other celebrities. IT MAKES THEM RICHER.

In fact, they specifically endorsed Countrywide by name. The same Countrywide widely responsible for predatory adjustable rate sub-prime lending and the accelerated collapse of the housing market. ENDORSED BY OPRAH WINFREY, ELLEN DEGENERES, AND DR PHIL. Now, there are commercial ties between nearly every industry and every public figure. IT MAKES THEM RICHER. It also drives up the cost for nearly every product and service on the market. So don’t fall for their ‘good will’ BS. ITS A LIE. If you fall for it, then you’re a fool. If you see any real difference between the moral character of a celebrity, politician, attorney, or executive, then you’re a fool. No offense fellow citizens. But we have been mislead by nearly every public figure. We still are. Even now, they claim to be ‘hurting’ right along with the rest of us. As if gas prices actually effect the lifestyle of a millionaire. ITS A LIE. IN 2007, THE RICHEST 1% INCREASED THEIR AVERAGE BOTTOM LINE WEALTH AGAIN.

On average, they are now worth over $4,000,000 each. Thats an all time high. As a group, they are now worth well over $17,000,000,000,000. THATS WELL OVER SEVENTEEN TRILLION DOLLARS. Another all time high. Which by the way, is much more than the entire middle and lower classes combined. Also more than enough to pay off our national debt, fund the Iraq war for a decade, repair our infrastructure, and bail out the US housing market. Still think that our biggest problem is China? Think again. Its the 1% club. That means every big name celebrity, athlete, executive, entrepreneur, developer, banker, and lottery winner. Along with many attorneys, doctors, and politicians. If they are rich, then they are part of the problem. Their incredible wealth was not ‘created’, ‘generated’, grown in their back yard, or printed up on their command. It was transfered FROM US TO THEM. Directly and indirectly. Its become near impossible to spend a dollar without making some greedy pig even richer. Don’t be fooled by the occasional loss of a millionaire’s fortune. Overall, they just keep getting richer. They absolutely will not stop. Still, they have the nerve to pretend as if they care about ordinary people. ITS A LIE. NOTHING BUT CALCULATED PR CRAP. WAKE UP PEOPLE. THEIR GOAL IS TO WIN THE GAME.

The 1% club will always say or do whatever it takes to get as rich as possible. Without the slightest regard for anything or anyone but themselves. Reaganomics. Their idea. Loans from China. Their idea. NAFTA. Their idea. Outsourcing. Their idea. Sub-prime. Their idea. High energy prices. Their idea. Oil ‘futures’. Their idea. Obscene health care charges. Their idea. The commercial lobbyist. Their idea. The multi-million dollar lawsuit. Their idea. The multi-million dollar endorsement deal. Their idea. $200 cell phone bills. Their idea. $200 basketball shoes. Their idea. $30 late fees. Their idea. $30 NSF fees. Their idea. $20 DVDs. Their idea. Subliminal advertising. Their idea. Brainwash plots on TV. Their idea. Vioxx, and Celebrex. Their idea. Excessive medical testing. Their idea.

The MASSIVE campaign to turn every American into a brainwashed, credit card, pharmaceutical, medical testing, love-sick, celebrity junkie. Their idea. All of the above drive up the cost of living, shrink the middle class, concentrate the world’s wealth and resources, create a dominoe effect of socio-economic problems, and wreak havok on society. All of which have been CREATED AND ENDORSED by celebrities, athletes, executives, entrepreneurs, attorneys, and politicians. IT MAKES THEM RICHER. So don’t fall for any of their ‘good will’ ‘humanitarian’ BS. ITS A SHAM. NOTHING BUT TAX DEDUCTIBLE PR CRAP. In many cases, the ‘charitable’ contribution is almost entirely offset. Not to mention the opportunity to plug their name, image, product, and ‘good will’ all at once. Which is usually done just before or after the release of their latest commercial project. IT MAKES THEM RICHER.

These filthy pigs even have the nerve to throw a fit and spin up a misleading defense with regard to ‘federal tax revenue’. ITS A SHAM. THEY SCREWED UP THE EQUATION TO BEGIN WITH. If the middle and lower classes had a greater share of the pie, they could easily cover a greater share of the federal tax revenue. They are held down in many ways because of greed. Wages remain stagnant for millions because the executives, celebrities, athletes, attorneys, and entrepreneurs, are paid millions. They over-sell, over-charge, under-pay, outsource, cut jobs, and benefits to increase their bottom line. As their profits rise, so do the stock values. Which are owned primarily by the richest 5%. As more United States wealth rises to the top, the middle and lower classes inevitably suffer. This reduces the potential tax reveue drawn from those brackets. At the same time, it wreaks havok on middle and lower class communities and increases the need for financial aid. Not to mention the spike in crime because of it. There is a dominoe effect to consider. IT CAN’T WORK THIS WAY.

But our leaders refuse to acknowledge this. Instead they come up with one trick after another to milk the system and screw the majority. These decisions are heavily influensed by the 1% club. Every year, billions of federal tax dollars are diverted behind the scenes back to the rich and their respective industries. Loans from China have been necessary to compensate in part, for the red ink and multi-trillion dollar transfer of wealth to the rich. At the same time, the feds have been pushing more financial burden onto the states who push them lower onto the cities. Again, the hardship is felt more by the majority and less by the 1% club. The rich prefer to live in exclusive areas or upper class communities. They get the best of everything. Reliable city services, new schools, freshly paved roads, upscale parks, ect. The middle and lower class communities get little or nothing without a local tax increase. Which, they usually can’t afford. So the red ink flows followed by service cuts and lay-offs. All because of the OBSCENE distribution of bottom line wealth in this country.

Anyway, when you account for all federal, state, and local taxes, the middle class actually pay about the same rate as the rich. The devil is in the details. So when people forgive the rich for their incredible greed and then praise them for paying a greater share of the FEDERAL income taxes, its like nails on a chalk board. I can not accept any theory that our economy would suffer in any way with a more reasonable distribution of wealth. Afterall, it was more reasonable 30 years ago. Before Reaganomics came along. Before GREED became such an epidemic. Before we had an army of over-paid executives, bankers, celebrities, athletes, attorneys, doctors, investors, entrepreneurs, developers, and sold-out politicians to kiss their asses. As a nation, we were in much better shape. Strong middle class, free and clear assets, lower crime rate, more widespread prosperity, stable job market, lower deficit, ect. Our economy as a whole was much more stable and prosperous for the majority. WITHOUT LOANS FROM CHINA.

Now, we have a more obscene distribution of bottom line wealth than ever before. We have a sold-out government, crumbling infrastructure, energy crisis, home forclosure epidemic, credit crunch, weak US dollar, 13 figure national deficit, and 12 figure annual shortfall. The cost of living is higher than ever before. Most people can’t even afford basic health care. ALL BECAUSE OF GREED. I really don’t blame the 2nd -5th percentiles in general. No economy could ever function without some reasonable scale of personal wealth and income. But it can’t be allowed to run wild like a mad dog. ALBERT EINSTEIN TRIED TO MAKE PEOPLE UNDERSTAND. UNBRIDLED CAPITALISM ABSOLUTELY CAN NOT WORK. TOP HEAVY ECONOMIES ALWAYS COLLAPSE.

Bottom line: The richest 1% will soon tank the largest economy in the world. It will be like nothing we’ve ever seen before. The American dream will be shattered. and thats just the beginning. Greed will eventually tank every major economy in the world. Causing millions to suffer and die. Oprah, Angelina, Brad, Bono, and Bill are not part of the solution. They are part of the problem. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A MULTI-MILLIONAIRE HUMANITARIAN. EXTREME WEALTH MAKES WORLD PROSPERITY ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE. WITHOUT WORLD PROSPERITY, THERE WILL NEVER BE WORLD PEACE OR ANYTHING EVEN CLOSE. GREED KILLS. IT WILL BE OUR DOWNFALL.

Of course, the rich will throw a fit and call me a madman. Of course, they will jump to small minded conclusions about ‘jealousy’, ‘envy’, or ’socialism’. Of course, their ignorant fans will do the same. You have to expect that. But I speak the truth. If you don’t believe me, then copy this entry and run it by any professor of economics or socio-economics. Then tell a friend. Call the local radio station. Re-post this entry or put it in your own words. Be one of the first to predict the worst economic and cultural crisis of all time and explain its cause. WE ARE IN BIG TROUBLE.

So what can we do about it? Well, not much. Unfortunately, we are stuck on a runaway train. The problem has gone unchecked for too many years. The US/global depression is comming thanks to the 1% club. It would take a massive effort by the vast majority to prevent it. Along with a voluntary sacrifice by the rich. THATS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. But if you believe in miracles, then spend your money as wisely as possible. Especially in middle and lower class communities. Check the Fortune 500 list and limit your support of high profit/low labor industries (Hollywood, pro sports, energy, credit, pharmaceutical, cable, satelite, internet advertising, cell phone, high fashion, jewelry, ect.).

Cancel all but one credit card for emergencies only. If you need a cell phone, then do your homework and find the best deal on a local pre-pay. If you want home internet access, then use the least expensive provider, and share accounts whenever possible. If you need to search, then use the less popular search engines. They usually produce the same results anyway. Don’t click on any internet ad. If you need the product or service, then look up the phone number or address and contact that business directly. Don’t pay to see any blockbuster movie. Instead, wait a few months and rent the DVD from a local store or buy it USED. If you want to see a big name game or event, then watch it in a local bar, club, or at home on network TV.

Don’t buy any high end official merchendise and don’t support the high end sponsors. If its endorsed by a big name celebrity, then don’t buy it. If you can afford a new car, then make an exception for GM, Ford, and Dodge. If they don’t increase their market share soon, then a lot more people are going to get screwed out of their pensions and/or benefits. Of course, you must know by now to avoid those big trucks and SUVs unless you truly need one for its intended purpose. Don’t be ashamed to buy a foreign car if you prefer it. Afterall, those with the most fuel efficient vehicles consume a lot less foreign oil. Which accounts for a pretty big chunk of our trade deficit. Anyway, the global economy is worth supporting to some extent. Its the obscene profit margins, trade deficits, and BS from OPEC that get us into trouble. Otherwise, the global economy would be a good thing for everyone. Just keep in mind that the big 3 are struggling and they do produce a few smaller reliable cars. Don’t frequent any high end department store or any business in a newly developed upper class community. By doing so, you make developers richer and draw support away from industrial areas and away from the middle class communities. Instead, support the local retailer and the less popular shopping centers. Especially in lower or middle class communities.

If you can afford to buy a home, then do so. But go smaller and less expensive. Don’t get yourself in too deep and don’t buy into the newly developed condos or gated communities. Instead, find a modest home in a building or neighborhood at least 20 years old. If you live in one of the poorer states, then try to support its economy first and foremost. Be on the lookout for commercial brainwash plots on TV. They are written into nearly every scene of nearly every show. Most cater to network sponsors and parent companies. Especially commercial health care. Big business is fine on occasion depending on the profit margins and profit sharing. Do your homework. If you want to support any legitimate charity, then do so directly. Never support any celebrity foundation. They spend most of their funding on PR campaigns, travel, and high end accomodations for themselves. Instead, go to Charitywatch.org and look up a top rated charity to support your favorite cause. In general, support the little guy as much as possible and the big guy as little as possible. Do your part to reverse the transfer of wealth away from the rich and back to the middle and lower classes. Unfortunately, there is no perfect answer.

Jobs will be lost either way. Innocent children will starve and die either way. But we need to support the largest group of workers with the most reasonable profit margins. We also need to support LEGITIMATE charities (Check that list at Charitywatch.org). This is our only chance to limit the severity and/or duration of the comming US/global depression. In the meantime, don’t listen to Bernanke, Paulson, Bartiromo, Orman, Dobbs, Kramer, OReiley, or any other public figure with regard to the economy. They are all plenty smart but I swear to you that they will lie right through their rotten teeth. IT MAKES THEM RICHER. These people work for big business. The ‘experts’ they cite also work for big business. They are all motivated by their desire to accumulate more wealth. THEY WILL LIE RIGHT THROUGH THEIR ROTTEN TEETH.

So don’t fall for their tricks. Instead, look at the big picture. The economic problems we face have been mounting for well over 20 years. All of them caused or aggrivated by a constant transfer of wealth from poorer to richer. Soon, it will cause the first ever GLOBAL DEPRESION. Its not brain surgery. Its simple math. Like I said, you are welcome to run this by any professor of economics or socio-economics. If thats not good enough, then look up what Einstein had to say about greed, extreme wealth, and its horrible concequences. I speak the truth. GREED KILLS. IT WILL BE OUR DOWNFALL.

Its already underway. A massive campaign to divert our attention. Trump, Buffet, OReiley, Dobbs, Pickens, Norris, and several other well known filthy rich public figures have been running their mouths about the economy. Finally admitting a hint of severity after almost 2 years of denial. They even have the nerve to acknowledge the possibility of a US/global depression. Still, they refuse to acknowledge the single greatest underlying cause. Instead, they focus on policies, procedures, and circumstances that were born FROM the underlying cause. Dancing their way around the big picture. DON'T FALL FOR IT.

Remember: Our national debt was way up BEFORE sub-prime. Consumer debt was way up BEFORE sub-prime. The cost of living was up BEFORE sub-prime. Wall Street profits were obscene BEFORE sub-prime. The middle class were loosing free and clear assets BEFORE sub-prime. Our infrastructure was in bad shape BEFORE sub-prime. Loans from China were taken out BEFORE sub-prime. The dollar was loosing value BEFORE sub-prime. So don’t let these cowardly filthy rich public figures divert your attention or limit your range of thought.

THE CURRENT ECONOMIC CRISIS WAS NOT CAUSED BY A SINGLE POLICY OR PROCEDURE. IT WAS CAUSED PRIMARILY BY A MASSIVE TRANSFER OF WEALTH FROM POOR TO RICH. THIS ALSO REPRESENTS A MASSIVE CONCENTRATION OF CAPITAL WORLDWIDE. OTHERWISE, THERE WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN SUCH A MARKET FOR SUB-PRIME AND THERE WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN A GLOBAL CREDIT CRUNCH. MONEY DOES NOT GROW ON TREES AND IT DOES NOT JUST FLOAT AWAY. IT ONLY TRANSFERS FROM ONE PARTY TO ANOTHER. ALBERT EINSTEIN TRIED TO MAKE PEOPLE UNDERSTAND. GREED KILLS. IT WILL BE OUR DOWNFALL.

A word for those who respond with the usual ‘I know more than you. Look how smart, knowledgable, and articulate I am’ crap. Let me say this in advance. I don’t claim to be an expert in this field. But I did go on record with these predictions long before any public figure uttered the word ‘recession’. If you search long enough, you will find my early postings from ‘05′ and ‘06′. Including the first draft of this rant. Since then, I’ve gone on record against people like Greenspan, Bernanke, and Paulson. So far, my predictions have been accurate. Like I said. This is not brain surgery. For the mostpart, its simple math. When you concentrate the world’s wealth, you also concentrate its capital and shrink the middle class along with the potential market for every major industry.

Homes go unsold. Bills go unpaid. Banks fail. More products go unsold. Jobs are lost. More banks fail. and so on. and so on. It happened 80 years ago. It will happen again. This time on a global scale. Throughout the cycle, the rich will tighten their grip. Concentrating the world’s wealth and resources even further and ensuring the collapse of every major economy worldwide. Think it can’t happen? Think again. GREED KILLS. IT WILL BE OUR DOWNFALL.

Another thing. I don’t want credit for any of this. Otherwise, I would have given my full name a long time ago. As far as I’m concerned, you can put this rant in your own words and take credit for all of it. I don’t care. Just spread the word. Otherwise, the greatest injustice of all time will go down in history unchecked.

By the way. The bailout won’t work. IT WON’T WORK. The plan fails to address the fundamental problem. The middle class don’t need more credit. They need a reasonable share of the economic pie. They also need a lower cost of living and a chance to catch their breath. They need a break from all of the psychological marketing tricks and mass market BS. Most of all, they need to wake up and see the truth. GREED KILLS. IT WILL BE OUR DOWNFALL.

To my surprise, two public figures have found the courage to acknowledge this problem to some degree. On 11.07.07 former presidential candidate Ron Paul mentioned the massive transfer of wealth from poor to rich. He also hinted at the possibility of economic collapse. He did so on 'Face the Nation'. He was blacklisted almost immediately for doing so. On 9.28.08 former secretary of labor Robert Reich refered to the obscene levels of income inequality as part of a "recipe for disaster". He mentioned the richest one percent in particular. He did so on 'Late Night With Conan OBrien'. As far as I know, Albert Einstein was the first to explain the link between extreme wealth and economic instability. He did so in 1949. He explained how the first Great Depression was actually caused by a massive transfer of wealth from poor to rich. He predicted that it would happen again. We are about to witness the first ever GLOBAL DEPRESSION. Amazing. The prosperity of an entire world is about to be compromised. Almost entirely because of greed. IT WILL BE OUR DOWNFALL.

The point about our government printing up more money was that it can't be done "on a whim" and that there are serious concequences for doing so (weak dollar, higher gas prices, inflation). I never said that it can't be or hasn't been done at all. Afterall, those loans from china weren't infused in the form of Chinese currency. They were infused in the form of our own. Not given to the middle class but instead to the banks in the form of credit. Its done nothing but perpetuate the problem. It never has been and never will be the answer. Sorry if I wasn't explicit enough the first time. The original draft was written 2 years ago and intended to fit within 300 characters. Anyway, I'm no English major. So if any of you want to re-word this post, feel free to do so. Whatever it takes to make people understand "
whew!
now THAT, is a comment eh?

Unfortunately he never came back to finish his thought(s).
Ever had a long-com like that?